


Shot in the head and you're to blame

by helenaamell



Category: Fallout (Video Games), Fallout: New Vegas
Genre: Amnesia, Angst, Cunnilingus, Dubious Consent, Exhibitionism, F/M, Flirting, Maybe fluff, Mentions of self mutilation, Misogyny, Oral Sex, Powerplay, Rape Mentions, Rough Sex, Slight Impregnation Kink, Smut, Teasing, idiots to lovers, mistreatments of sexworkers, morally grey courier, overuse of the word baby
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-15
Updated: 2019-02-23
Packaged: 2019-04-23 10:25:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 40,233
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14330457
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/helenaamell/pseuds/helenaamell
Summary: Okay so this is a re-upload of a fic that I originally wrote when I was tipsy but then I hated it after reading through it sober so heres the edited new version.Benny is in need of a prostitute to act as his girlfriend for some talks with the big families and Mr. House. The courier comes into town at just the right time and after getting instructions from House she works her way undercover to take the job. However she feels many conflicting emotions at the thought of having sex with the man that cost her all of her memories. To add salt to the wounds she finds herself more and more drawn to him and she fears that when the time comes to end him her feelings might betray her.





	1. An offer she couldn't refuse

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I am not a native english speaker.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Also if you're unfamiliar with the reference of the title of this "work" it's a play on an old rock song by Bon Jovi because I was a dad in a previous life I guess, also my humor is really bad so consider it your warning.
> 
> The song is called "you give love a bad name"

She was waiting by the bar of his suite, platinum bleached blonde waves covering one of her eyes and snaking behind her ear on the other side of her face. A red dress going down to her one knee and then going back up into a slit on her other leg showing off her garter, high heels adding a final vava voom to her legs.

Her plunging neckline showed off her heavy chest that was prickled with various small scars and beauty marks.

Cherry was beautiful by most people’s standards, a curvy body and a face that had gotten her out of trouble more than a few times.

On the inside however she was an experienced _enough_ wastelander, having been able to survive and fight her way here even without her memories to get her this far, and her hands were calloused to show that she had worked all of her life.

Other than that she could’ve passed off for someone who’d spent their life inside the safe walls of the strip. Well apart from that one part of her hair that was shorter than the rest from where a bullet had hit. 

Her name stemmed from a cherry tattoo on her wrist that had already been there when she regained consciousness in Goodsprings. The doctor had asked for her name and she had no clue, so she decided it would be Cherry - basing whoever she might be now on the one thing that was left to indicate who she had been before.

Now she found herself waiting for the infamous Benny to return, for whom she was posed as a Gomorrah hooker. Back when he had shot her dirt had covered most of her face and she had armor on her body covering her up from head to toe. His priority had been to look her in the eye, the rest of her face hadn’t been of interest to him fortunately.  
  
She had met with the notorious House, a man(?) who was adamant that he needed her to find out more about Benny’s plans rather than her simply killing him, he apparently needed her to figure out what he knew and then get that chip back. So she couldn’t just kill him then and there, no, she needed a plan that would put her close to him.  
  
When she came to Vegas she had looked a right mess, she had headlice and was covered in dried blood and dirt. She had stumbled into the follower’s fortress barely hanging on for dear life, having made her way there after being attacked by too many radscorpions to count after leaving Novac. Foolishly enough she hadn’t packed enough stimpaks and the Mojave sun seemed to be out to finish the job. After being bathed and treated a doctor named Arcade had informed her that for now the only remedy for headlice they had on hand was bleach.  
  
That’s how she had ended up with this new blonde look. She was naturally a brunette, but now it was almost white in color, perfectly styled by some _actual_ Gomorrah gals. She didn’t remember anything about herself so the change in color hadn’t bothered her too much, atleast now she was lice free. It did however change how she was treated by the people on the strip, since apparently the gals at Gomorrah were notorious for sporting different unnatural colors to be more memorable to customers. So people just naturally assumed she was one of them.  
  
That’s what had given her this idea to begin with, if they bought it so would _he_ after all.

That’s how she had found out about this job too, for whatever reason Benny needed an escort for a weekend and the girl that originally had been hired had given up on the job when Cherry showed she could double the amount that he would have paid her.

She had worked hard in order to scrape up that money, doing errands for nobodies and looting throughout the wastes like the rest of the scavangers, eager for profit. House had coughed up the rest since it was he that had set her out on this mission after all.  
  
  
  
The rattling of the key in the lock of the suite brought her out of her reverie and she pulled back her arms back and pushed her chest up - doing her best to look as enticing as she could.  
  
As she saw his face again she shuddered, it felt surreal seeing the man that had tried to kill her and almost succeeded standing in front of her. The leering smile plastered over his face was causing her to feel nauseous but also made a sickly sort of arousal tingle throughout her body.  
  
Judging by his expression she guessed she had been lucky and he hadn’t recognized her.  
  
“Well, well, well, I don’t remember my birthday coming early this year. Whatever can the Ben man do for you honey baby. “

His voice rumbled through the spacious room, the familiarity of its sound was causing goosebumps to form along her skin as he spoke.  
  
She knew she had to put her acting skills to work but she felt every fiber of her body working against her.  
  
Pressing her tits together with her arms and trying to make her most enticing face she tried to play her part convincingly enough - she was a woman on a mission after all.  
  
“Oh, your brother sent for me, said you needed a girl for the whole weekend and apparently little old me fit the bill.” She voiced, her voice a sing-song like tone she’d heard a handful of girls use at the Gomorrah.  
  
“Swank is a real pal aint he and baby you’re just perfect for the job.” He answered  
  
She feigned a giggle, trying her best to sound as aloof as she could muster.  
  
“A gal does her best to be memorable after all” she purred as she strode over to him, slow and deliberately while moving her hips from side to side, not too much but just enough.  
  
“Doll I can tell just from looking at ya I ain’t gonna be able to forget you.”  
  
Striding up to him slowly as if trying to make an impression she felt her blood boil, stroking her hand along his shoulder as she circled him, pressing herself up in different ways so he could take all of her in as he followed her with his eyes, like a predator stalking its prey.  
  
“I usually don’t need the services your fine establishment provides, so I hope ya don’t think too badly of me right off the bat. I can imagine a ring a ding gal like you have had her fair share of dogs as customers.” She had closed their distance enough where she could feel the heat of his breath as he spoke and it made her knees buckle.  
  
“I’m new baby, haven’t been in the business for too long. But I’m eager to learn from such a man as you.” She proclaimed  
  
She could feel his hand stroking up on her and she purred despite herself. There was something intoxicating about him and she was angry at herself for picking up on it.  
  
“Hold on honey baby, I realize you’re a gorgeous dame and my more base instincts wants to just claim you here and now but I need to go over a few details before we continue.” He chuckled  
  
She whined disappointedly beside herself and as soon as she realized it she cursed herself.  
  
“What can I do for you baby?” She answered  
  
It was a conscious decision to use a pet name, it felt like she should due to his clear preference for them but at the same time it made her stomach curl.  
  
“I need you to follow me along for a few events this weekend, mostly stuff to do with the maintenance of this strip and all. We’re supposed to bring dates and that’s tricky business for a man like me.” He explained  
  
“How so? You’re powerful, handsome and you seem like you’ve got your act together.”   
  
He chuckled, probably aware that flattery was part of the Gomorrah girl’s routines.  
  
“Well honey baby, even a man such as myself has a hard time to uphold relationships of any sort. I work with my guys and they are easy enough to get along with. But dames such as yourself takes a little work and while I ain’t the type of guy to back down faced with a challenge, in the real world I can be one to put work first you might say.”  
  
She thought back on that night in Goodsprings, his gun aimed at her forehead, an inscribed handle that she had appreciated for its craftsmanship before it went off. She didn’t know why she could remember that but not her parent’s names, her home. Her anger soothed her and it managed to help her in acting along with him. Maybe these meetings would explain things further, maybe it would shine some light on why he had decided that her fate would be one that ended up in a shallow grave.  
  
She put on her gameface again, this was business for both of them even though he might not recognize the conditions as well as she did.  
  
“Alright, as long as you pay my fee I am at your disposal baby.”  
  
He grinned at her and drew up a pouch filled with caps for her, she looked into it and realized it was enough to fund her for the next six months. She gasped, what could he want her to do to earn such a sum? The rate the other girl had said he would pay her was just the standard one, this was atleast triple that initial amount.  
  
He seemed to have read her thoughts as he motioned her to follow him to the bar.  
“The reason I’m payin’ you so generously is cuz you’re likely going to have to switch employer after the job is done. I mean if those Omerta’s catch on this story won’t be able to sell after all.”  
  
“I wasn’t informed of that…” she murmured, thoughts swirling through her head  
  
“Well babydoll, I will provide you with more funds to keep you on your feet for as long as you need. See this as a change in employer more than anything. You won’t have to spread your legs for any guy with caps after this, it’s a good offer if ya ask me.”  
  
“Deal.” Was her quick response  
  
His face lit up for a second at her quick answer before he continued  
  
“The conditions are real simple doll, all you gotta do is act like you’re my girlfriend and stand there lookin’ pretty by my side as I arrange some business.” He purred  
  
“Why does it matter if you have a girlfriend on the strip? Also what makes you think the Omerta’s won’t recognize me?”  
  
She knew herself that they wouldn’t, she wasn’t actually a Gomorrah girl after all so why should they.  
  
“I was assuming Swank told ya the details but it seems he has left shit out, I hired you specifically because you’re new. If you’d worked at the Gomorrah longer it would rule you out of course, but I wanted a fresh face that was made sure to not have been spotted by them. Have you ever seen one of the Omerta’s?” He inquired  
  
“No, no I haven’t, my work has mostly been around the girls, doing hair and whatnot. But I can’t rule out that they’ve seen me around the place without me knowing.”  
  
“Well that’s exactly what I’m lookin’ for, you see the power of this strip is based a lot on offspring. Mr. House is very focused on families living on to maintain the businesses, it was one of the conditions as he let us take charge of our perspective businesses. We signed a contract saying we would offer offspring if possible to carry on our works, so a girlfriend or whatnot would signify my hard work to remain within his good graces. Maybe the others will bring partners along as well, but it’s better to be safe than sorry dontcha agree honey baby?”  
  
“Makes sense I suppose, do you need me to act any certain type of way to sell your story?” She asked  
  
“Nah, act however you want just don’t stir shit up. Actually it would help if you play down your smarts, these guys will bite when they think they have something to chew. If you act like a real bimbo they might just brush you off, I can tell from our short meeting here that aint the case, but play up the acting would ya?”  
  
“Consider it done baby.”  
  
“With words like that you’re gonna make me blow my cover, you’re just my type and everything sugar.” He smirked  
  
“So do you need me to act as your girlfriend for longer than this weekend since you’re going to keep paying me?”  
  
“Well I moreso figured that with the caps I provide you get to make your own decision about where to head off. You can stay at the tops if ya like of course, but if you wanna move away I will support that too. I can just tell the folks around that ya got cold feet, either way you don't have to worry doll.”  
  
This deal made her feel bad for the original girl, he was offering to buy her out. Maybe she could hand these caps over to her after all of this was over, but for now she needed to play along.  
  
He went towards the bar and poured himself a glass of what seemed to be scotch. Before gesturing for her to come sit down where she had previously sat.  
  
“What’s your poison of choice honey baby?”  
  
“You have any rum & nuka?”  
  
“That I do.”  
  
As he fixed her drink she crossed her legs and wondered what she was supposed to do. Acting the part of a prostitute had felt sort of straight forward, but what Benny was out for was apparently something that had her being close to him in regular situations out and about.  
  
As he offered her the drink she took a sip, forcing herself not to chug it for the sake of courage.  
  
He went to sit next to her and her eyes looked up to meet his. They were a deep dark brown that verged on almost black, it made her shiver seeing them and admiring their warmth, he felt too close.  
  
“So honey baby, if we’re going to sell this story were going to just have to learn the basics about eachother. In case any questions would arise, nothing invasive of course, but how we met and whatnot can be good things to come up with. Can’t hurt to be prepared dontcha think?”  
  
She took another sip of her drink, she wished to down it all even more now.  
  
“You have any suggestions?”  
  
He leaned back with his arm on the barcounter and seemed to think.  
  
“Well it would be a safe bet to say you stumbled into town for the same reason as anyone else I suppose. But the strip is a bit harder to get into after all, how about we sell the story that you’re a nice gal whose farm I stumbled upon. Love at first sight and yada yada yada.”  
  
She smirked at him, he was set on selling this story alright.  
  
“Ma would’ve sniped you if ya got anywhere near the homestead pretty boy.”  
  
She joked and played along.  
  
He snorted and took another chug “oh I like that, but everyone has their price don’t they?”  
  
“Well I figure she would’ve appreciated it if you brought some wine. The traders don’t come by too often and she’s partial to the less Christian pleasures of life.”  
  
“Liking her already baby, sounds like a ring a ding gal, you know how to swing a good story I’ll give ya that!”  
  
She dared to take an actual swig of her drink this time, it felt like the air had become less stiff between them.  
  
They made further small talk and decided on a backstory. Benny had come through with his gang and had bribed her mother with alcohol and cigarettes in exchange for bed and board. That’s where they had met and now they were sweethearts.  
  
“So how about you? Anything I should know about you Benny baby?”  
  
“Ain’t much to tell ya, I run this place at the good grace of Mr. House.”  
  
She noticed him flinch at the question so she decided not to probe him just yet. There was still time to butter him up before getting down to what she was there for.  
  
He took out a cigarette and lit it, she felt the tingle of alcohol take a comforting hold of her, dulling her nervousness further. The radio played low in the background and she heard the low deep voice of Mr. New Vegas speaking about a courier. She drew lazy circles around the top of her glass as she looked discreetly at Benny and saw him looking as if he was listening intently to the mans words.  
  
“Wonder what you’ve gotta be made off to survive a shot to the head.”  
  
She mumbled to him wanting to test him a little.  
  
He let out a humorless chuckle and took another drag of his cigarette before offering one to her.  
  
“Your guess is as good as mine baby. Maybe she just had a thick skull.”  
  
As she lifted her left arm to allow him to light her cigarette he caught a look at her tattoo. She waited for him to ask about it, tattoos were a rare sight in the wasteland from what she had seen. But he never did, they sat in silence for a bit longer before he looked up towards the clock.  
  
“It’s time for our first outing babydoll, I’ll let you change since it’s a formal errand and all. Not to say I don’t love what you’re already wearing of course, but were going to be representing the tops after all. Gotta have you lookin’ a little less smokin’ and a little more demure, I am of course a perfect gentleman most of the time but I can’t say the same for the animals I work with.”  
  
She went to make herself ready in a sideroom, she was going to wear a light bue dress that was more formal than what she was used to. It was sleeveless and had a mermaid fit with a flared out skirt, it was hugging her every curve enough that she just knew it was going to be uncomfortable. It felt as if it had been designed for a girl with a more slender figure. She had took over this job last second after all so some sizing issues were bound to happen since the dress had been prepared beforehand.  
  
She pulled the dress up and realized to her horror it had a zipper that she couldn’t quite reach, she tried to reach it by bending her arms as far back as she could but to no avail. She heard a faint knock on the door before Benny’s voice reached her ears.  
  
“Everything all right in there doll? Is the fit alright?”  
  
“Yeah I just can’t reach the zipper, can you be a dear and help a gal out?”  
  
He came into the room and came up behind her as she stood with her hands keeping the cups of the dress up against her chest. His breath was hot against her neck as he pulled the zipper up, he had gotten much closer than she felt she could handle.  
  
“This dress was supposed to be less sultry doll, but then again with a body like that you’d still look hot as sin wearing a sack.”  
  
She felt his hand trace up the side of her waist and she looked up into the mirror seeing their reflection as he watched her. Eating her up with his eyes in a way that felt like it could make her wet all by itself. She found herself pressing her ass back against him playfully as she leaned forward to apply her red lipstick. He had her feeling intoxicated and she cursed herself for it.  
  
He gave her a light peck on her neck before he stepped back to sit on the bed.  
  
She went to get her stockings and she sat down next to him to pull them on, wanting to show off her legs. He growled as she hiked up her skirt to pull them on and he traced playfully with his finger along her thigh. When she went to put on her second stocking he stood up and gently lifted her leg up, taking over her work and pulling it up her leg dangerously slow. As he fastened them to her garter belt his finger ghosted over her mound and she mewled. What was it about him that made her forget herself like this already, she wanted him to just fuck her already and get this torture over with.  
  
She needed to feel in control again but there was no time for that now, she needed to be at that meeting with him to try and get closer to him.    
  
She jumped up as he gave her a light pat on her hip to notify her that he had finished his work on her and she felt like she needed to create some distance between them.  
  
She spun around allowing the baby blue fabric to do its work to sell the illusion. She looked over to him and saw him smiling, a warm genuine smile that reached his dark eyes and she felt a slight burn mixed with shame as a result.  
  
“Better get going doll, they are expecting a show after all.”  
  
“Of course.”  
  
She replied swiftly, ready for the sharks more so than she felt ready for him.


	2. Her best behaviour

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Edited 7/12/18

As they walked along the strip he snaked his arm around her waist and she shuddered in response, an instinctual response rather than a conscious one. His touch felt like a bolt of electricity on her skin, and oh how she hated herself for it as she felt the burn linger.

She was the type of woman to wear her heart on her sleeve, and acting wasn’t necessarily her forte. The night air did its work in steadying her however, it may be irradiated but it was cool and felt nice to breathe in as she tried to think of something unsexy to cool her down.

Feeling goosebumps form on her skin Benny seemed to sense her inner turmoil as he traced lightly along her arm before letting out a soft chuckle.  
  
“Nervous honey baby?” He inquired, his tone of voice soft enough so only she might hear it.  
  
Figuring that would be the perfect excuse for her being so jumpy she simply nodded in response to his words.  
  
“Don’t worry about a thing doll, you’re going to do just fine, just stay _real_ close to me the entire time and you’ll be great.”  
  
She squealed as he pinched her ass before slapping him lightly, seeing a mischievous grin form on his face she felt irritation and arousal form in her lower stomach.

The man was infuriating and she wanted to sock him, but alas this was part of the job description, which made her reconsider. As that thought crossed her mind she realised to her own horror that he had never said anything about the sexual aspect of the arrangement.

Would she just have to go around and be ready whenever? She couldn’t very well ask, that would be like showing all of her cards.  
  
Suddenly she felt an idea arise within her, if she could just manage to piss him off enough without causing a blatant scene, maybe he would simply fire her. That wouldn’t fall on her after all and then she wouldn’t have to worry about having to fuck the man that had tried to kill her, and almost succeeded.  
  
As they entered the 38 Benny and Swank seemed like they were in awe of the place. Cherry however just looked around in the now all too familiar casino, it was like a massive relic and it made her almost sad to see. 

It was in much better shape than most of Vegas, holding only robots the filth that came along with humans didn’t leave as much of a trace on the walls. But the eerie quiet of the place - apart from the feint buzzing of securitrons, made the place feel dead.

  
Benny’s arm around her waist guided her as they entered the elevator that took them to the cocktail lounge, she had been there during her first trip to the 38 but she still tried to act as impressed as she possibly could.

One of her first nights in Vegas had been spent in there after all, drinking straight from an ancient bottle of what she could only have assumed to be wine while looking out the many windows. Dangling her legs off of the barcounter and feeling like a little girl getting free range of the homestead for the first time.

 

  
The first meeting would involve a small cocktailparty, it was to let all the families clear the air and get to know the building, or rather the floor since the securitron guarding the elevator wouldn’t allow anyone to go further. Swank seemed like he had been let into a secret treasurechamber and she felt herself endeared by his boyish expressions as he let himself crusade the area, after all she knew the feeling.  
  
Benny stayed close by her, apparently not being too impressed (or simply not letting on if he was) by the new milieu. She realized they had been fashionably late as the other families were already sat down around a larger table.

There seemed to be a VIP area, and then just different people affiliated with the families scattered about. She looked to the prominent members table and caught the eye of one man, he was older and wore a suit like all the other men in the establishement but he had a glare to him that put her off and her spine tingled unpleasantly at the sight of him, as if her instincts were telling her to stay clear. She felt Benny squeeze her waist a little firmer and she looked up to him, seeing a confident smirk plastered on his face.  
  
“It’s showtime babydoll.”  
  
He leaned in and whispered in her ear, letting his mouth linger a little too long for it to be coincidental along the slope of her earlobe and she shuddered at the sensation.  
  
He guided her towards the unfamiliar crowd and she still felt the other man’s stare on her. She tried to lean on Benny and play her part as best as she could to distract herself.  
  
“Well, well, well, look what the cat dragged in.”  
  
A woman muttered, her dark curls styled to perfection and a face that didn’t betray whatever she might feel toward the new arrivals. She looked a little sickly, but then again that was the wasteland look after all.  
  
“Marjoire, I see ya brought your partner along, dontcha think the top hat is a bit much Mortimer ol’ boy?”  
  
“Charming.” Was all the strange man sneered in response.  
  
Cherry stifled a giggle at the strange attire he wore, she imagined he was styled as the perfect supervillain with that hat and she would’ve expected no less from the strips high and mighty.

Considering they were all originally khans  she couldn’t help but wonder if House had provided the hat or if Mortimer had simply worn it on his own.  
  
“Wasn’t aware we could bring along just anyone to these meetings.” The man with the awful stare muttered  
  
“Ah Nero, but this dame ain’t just anyone. She’s my fiancé and thereby a valued member of the chairmen.”  
  
She heard a man sat next to Nero snort.  
  
“Somehow I find that hard to believe.”

The man in question had a tone of voice that she could only think to describe as repulsed.   
  
“Ah, Cachino, with that limited mind of yours I doubt it’s in your best interest to listen to it at all.”  
  
The man called Cachino started to get up, to start some type of brawl no doubt, but he was stopped by his companion. An arm to his chest to hold him back, letting Cherry know whom answered to whom.  
  
“Now, now, we are after all on unfamiliar territory. Let’s play nice for now and rip eachother’s throats out at a later time.”

Nero growled from behind gritted teeth  
  
“Ain’t you just the voice of reason amongst us Nero, how’s the hookers treatin’ ya?”  
  
The man that gave Cherry chills chuckled at that, a sound she felt get down to her core and freeze it to solid ice.  
  
“I won’t let them anywhere near me I can assure you, a man doesn’t shit where he eats after all.” His voice dripped with venom and the hint of a grin ghosted over his lips.  
  
Cherry felt herself turn her hands into fists, those girls she’d met were nicer than most people out there and she vowed to make him eat those words at a later date. Luckily enough she was House’s eyes and ears in here so this gave her a fair view of what each of the families were like.

Bloodthirsty, pompous and _annoying_.

  
Benny caught on to her tension, no doubt making his own assumptions regarding them. He stroked along her arm lightly again, maybe it was meant to seem loving to their audience but it only served to give her goosebumps once more.  
  
She scanned the area further to take her mind away from her own anger, silently counting to ten while watching people she could only assume to be less important spread out over the floor. This first event was after all supposed to be more casual, which was why she felt slightly perturbed at the comments regarding herself. 

It wasn’t like everyone here was close family to these... _People._

Those she saw around her she knew for a fact didn’t hold any high positions in their respective establishments. But it was moreso the families showing off their alliances - bringing as many people as possible along. But with a relatively limited population the room still felt more subdued than a night at the Gomorrah when the NCR was on leave.  
  
Benny went to guide her to sit down next to him around the VIP table, even though this was supposedly casual there was still the element of talking shop to be considered.  
  
Shutting out the talks as whitenoise she found herself looking out over a group of people dancing together to the radio. She wondered if Mr. House might have some connection to Mr. New Vegas since the tunes seemed to be of a more lively character than usual.

She wouldn’t rule it out, that big old robot treated everyone and everything as personal property, _herself_ _included_. As she first met him and received her instructions she felt infinitely safer after learning the fact that he was a simple monitor and not a man in the flesh.

But now the smooth jazz had her feeling at ease, and she leaned into Benny further to show just how _close_ they were.  
  
A securitron rolled over with beverages and she took large swigs of champagne to regain her sense of self. Benny put her on edge and she wanted what she knew to be _herself_ back. She didn’t want to be wasted, but she needed that faint buzz to make her not so anxious.  
  
She heard the families talking behind her, low mumbles mostly drowned out by jazzy singers and laughter from the dancefloor. She felt herself drawn to the sight of them all, catching the eyes of a young man who seemed to be the sort to light up an entire room.

He was dancing awfully close to a gal with flaming red, perfectly styled locks but he snuck a look over to Cherry a little too often for her to feel it was a coincidence.

His skin was beautifully dark and his smile was contagious, strangely white in a world where a full set of teeth alone could be considered a virtue. She felt herself winking at him and playfully flirting using her eyes alone.

His date then turned around to watch her too and to her pleasant surprise she too seemed intrigued. Cherry felt a thrill going through her as she uncrossed and then recrossed her legs, knowing full well she wasn’t wearing very modest underwear and seeing the couple grin at her made her shudder ever so softly.  
  
  
She expressed herself through sex, that much felt instinctual and was her one trait that anchored her to her identity. She felt it spring onto her naturally, it was a defense mechanism as well as simply a way to get her mind off of things. Her instincts wanted to join them, have a tumble in the hay and regain what small feeling of self that remained.  
  
Undercover work wasn’t her forte, she had to hold herself back she assumed - but then she felt Benny’s hand search its way to playfully trace over her mound. She turned around slightly only to see him act fully engaged in his talks and she smirked.  
  
He was playing along with her nature and she ate it all up, uncrossing her legs again so his fingers could be allowed better access. She heard a rumbling chuckle from behind that echoed deliciously as vibrations through her, but he no doubt played it off as being part of what she assumed was a _highly_ uninteresting conversation.  
  
She turned her arm back to him, playing with his tie a little, a familiar gesture that no doubt would be thought of as intimate to someone unfamiliar with their relationship. She caught the attention of Cachino looking over to her this time.  
  
“Hey, I didn’t catch your dames name there Benny, she seems somehow familiar?”  
  
She turned around softly, turning herself to face in his direction.  
  
Realising then that she hadn’t actually told Benny her name either she offered her hand boldly along the table to Cachino, channeling an old Hollywood flick she’d seen at a broken down drive in somewhere. Having her hand hanging somewhat limply, it felt like a strange gesture but it had looked classy enough when she saw the actress doing it and if she were to play a role why not go all in?  
  
“I’m Cherry and if you actually did know me I assure you - _you_ _would_ _remember_.”  
  
She gave him a playful wink and he seemed intrigued, taking her hand up to his mouth to give it a light peck. She felt Benny’s hand, now on her hip gripping tighter - oh he didn’t like that did he?  
  
“Of course, I should’ve guessed as much, a dame such as you doesn’t come by here too often.”

Cachino mumbled, seemingly almost flustered.  
  
Benny gave a strained chuckle, he seemed frustrated by her boldness.  
  
“No, they sure don’t and this one is claimed so don’t even think about putting her in one of your flicks.”  
  
She raised her brow slightly at the man and saw Cachino’s demeanor change.  
  
“You better shut your trap.”  
  
“Don’t make the moves on my dame if you don’t want me to bite is all I’m sayin.”  
  
She felt a slight stirring at the possessive way Benny had called her his _dame_. Why did she enjoy that?  
  
Oh hell, it didn’t matter anymore, she felt like she had herself back somewhat and she would enjoy every bit of it while she could.  
  
Turning her gaze back on the couple she found that they had been swept away by the stream of dancers, she pouted a little at that and ruefully turned back to the talks.  
  
Benny seemed to be in game mode and she didn’t have much to add to the conversation, she didn’t want to allude to her knowing more than a girlfriend should. Not that she did either way, Vegas was as new to her as to any of those Goodspringsfolks she remembered patching her up.

But she was bored and that was usually her cue for making bad decisions, so she reached over to his glass to take a sip of it. Adding her red lipstick to it as a playful gesture, he seemed to notice and brought it back up to his lips, leaving a small stain of red behind and the look he gave her while doing so made her burn.

He wasn’t even _pretending_ to be interested in the talks anymore and she loved that she could shift his focus fully in such a way, and the sight of the small stain of her lipstick on his lips made her want to lick it off.  
  
But then just as she felt that rush return Benny resumed his feigned interest in whatever the important people were talking about and she was again left with her own thoughts as her only company.  
  
She stared out the window, she couldn’t very well interrupt him since the securitrons were everywhere and House would find out about her self-sabotage.  
  
Suddenly she felt someone poke at her shoulder and so she turned around only to see the man she had exchanged winks with earlier stand there, his hand reached out to her.  
  
“Care for a dance?” He asked, his voice deep and enticing.  
  
She felt mischevious, this man was bold enough to go up to these dangerous people and that fact alone had her liking him already. She didn’t give it a second thought as she linked her hand with his before he led her away.  
  
The tune was still jazzy and the man pulled her close, she followed his lead as they swayed amongst the people.  
  
“Haven’t seen you around before doll.” He murmured into her ear  
  
She hummed happily, she was anonymous in this setting and that gave her a delicious sense of freedom.  
  
“I’m new to these parts of the Mojave.”  
  
“Ah, that explains it.”  
  
She looked over and saw Benny looking intently at her, not even bothering with being discreet about it, and she felt excitement spread throughout her body in response as she recognized his expression – anger.  
  
“Seems I’ve pissed your man off, you sure this is okay sweetheart?”  
  
His words alluded to him being concerned but his tone betrayed him, it seemed like he too was enjoying himself, they must be two peas in a pod.  
  
“It absolutely isn’t.”  
  
She smirked and looked back into his dark eyes, high on the sensation of breaking the rules she knew she ought to follow. Benny’s pride might be hurting but this was the only way she could rebel against all this nonsense. She had come to Vegas to kill him after all, only to be ordered to get close to him.

The absurdity of all her feelings over the last week had come to a peak in this rebellion. It felt like a build up before a sweet climax and she _hungered_ for release. Maybe Benny would throw her out and she could go to House saying the mission had failed. Then she could finally make her way into the tops to return the favor she was reminded of whenever her fingers traced over her head.  
  
As her partner dipped her down she was greeted by the familiar sight of a checkered blazer.  
  
“Mind if I steal her pal?” He asked, his voice a low threatening rumble, alluding to the fact that it wasn’t _really_ a question.  
  
Cherry didn’t feel like having her new found friend turned into a casualty for the sake of her plans so she simply turned herself to face Benny, putting her hand on his shoulder before chuckling as he took over as her partner.  
  
She felt the eyes of the families on them and it tingled into her spine that she was putting him on the spot like this.  
   
“You’re pushin’ my buttons here babydoll, I think I told ya not to draw attention to yourself.”  
  
He snarled into her ear and she shivered at the pleasure of his anger.  
  
“Now, now baby, we’re putting on a show aren’t we? You didn’t expect me to simply behave while you neglected me so cruelly did ya?”  
  
He chuckled slightly as he dipped her down and brought his face close to hers.  
  
“Don’t play with my business unless you want to piss me off doll.” His voice was a low snarl now, reminding her of her place beneath him.

A place that she for the first time that night _longed_ to be. The sexual tension now thick enough to carve with anold rusted knife.  
  
She purred at his anger, she was a thrillseeker by nature and this anger could either serve as a way of finishing her job off sooner or it would give her the pleasure of his anger _in_ _other_ _ways_.  
  
“Baby, it’s my job to find your buttons dontcha think? The hot tempered lover would certainly sell better than simply me clinging to your arm in silence, let loose a little why dontcha.”  
  
Her power was back and she felt high on it, she didn’t like him steering the wheels one bit and if he was going to try to put her in her place he better work for it.  
  
Seeming to enjoy her insolence, she felt his hand sneak up to pull her skirt upward. The frills of the lower part of it acting as a shield to prying eyes.  
  
“I thought I told ya honey baby, I ain’t one to back down from a challenge.”  
  
Two of his fingers searched its way inside of her underwear and she gasped as she felt him plunge into her wetness. Luckily it wasn’t noticed by the other people dancing since the music was loud enough to cancel it out.  
  
His calloused fingers felt rough inside of her and she mewled as he pressed them further into her, hooking his fingers and finding that spot within her that made her purr. The fact that anyone could see what he was doing if they just looked over to them had her shuddering, if anyone turned off the radio she didn’t doubt the lewd sounds of what he was doing to her would ring throughout the floor.

He smelled of smoke and alcohol, his hot breath ghosting over the side of her neck as his fingers explored her. 

But his deliberate stroking only just took her up to that edge where she could almost _taste_ her release before he suddenly let go. Stroking his now wet hand over her ass instead and she mewled disappointedly in response.

God it was almost _painful_  as she felt her climax disappear. She yearned for it, needed it and he was so cruel to rip it from her. Would it be undignified to ask for more?  
  
She looked up into his dark eyes and bit her lower lip, letting out a sultry yet shaky giggle.  
  
“You’re not too well behaved either I take it?”  
  
“Oh baby, you’ve got no idea.”  
  
His tone of voice was threatening and she felt a chill come up her spine as she remembered _that_ night again. She did have a better idea than most but she wasn’t going to show her cards at such a small provocation.  
  
He leaned back into her ear as he continued

“if you don’t start behavin’ I’ll make these upcoming days hell for ya pussycat, I will bring you to that brink again and again until I have you begging for me. But I won’t give you that release unless you’ve earned it.”  
  
She mewled in distress, he wasn’t playing fair and she felt so deliciously shameless. Would she back down from his challenge based on her primal urges? Were her morals more important than her pleasure? Apparently not or else she wouldn’t be here, but this was a powerplay and that was a line she didn’t know if she was prepared to cross. Her sense of power was all she had left and without it she was both exposed and vulnerable to him.  
  
He created distance between them before he returned her back to the table with him, her rebellion still lurked within her but she was acutely aware of the burn between her legs. She needed to get her control back, but she didn’t know how and that made her furious.


	3. Impressive handiwork

He sat her down in a couch as he pulled her down to sit on his lap.  She couldn't help but notice that the VIPs seemed to have scattered around to their separate factions, meaning she was now more or less all alone with this infuriatingly sexy man. It was a terrifying realisation as well as a delicious one.

This way her _misbehaving_ wouldn’t be getting as much of an audience however, and that fact alone was something she didn’t appreciate. She had loved the thrill of Benny’s fingers inside her on the dancefloor – the man that had shot her in the head fucking her with his fingers for _whoever_ to see.  
  
It was a bizarre thought, shameless, filthy and wrong on every level. But oh how she _loved_ it, her body was on fire and she realized to her great horror that her nipples had stiffened under her thin lacy bra. If someone took enough of a look it would be impossible not to notice it and she felt self-conscious, crossing her arms as a last resort to cover up.  
  
“Seems you’ve upset your broad Benny, she looks like she’s pissed at ya. But I’d have to admit, if I didn’t know she was for hire I would’ve bought the story of the two of you being a thing. I never thought of you as much of an actor but that red face you made when that gasser came up to take her away - priceless. It was worth it's weight in caps seeing you storm off all angry and shit.”  
  
Swank seemed to have gotten some drinks into his system because his tongue had loosened up quite apparently. But Cherry gritted her teeth at the mention of her being for hire, she had just started to forget that part.  
  
“Hey the Ben-man has an act to keep up, don’t read into it too much.” He muttered  
  
A smirk spread over her lips, he didn’t like it seeming like he cared what she was up to? It was funny that he was being defensive, considering he had been so cocky just a minute ago.  
  
Reaching over towards the small table she took another glass of champagne, a securitron had apparently left a tray behind for them and as she did she rubbed herself a little extra on his lap as a small act of defiance causing him to release a low growl. She wanted him to get her off for sure, but orgasms no matter how good she could remember them being (she had only had one since she woke up and that was just stressrelief for when she couldn’t sleep) weren’t enough to make her settle down.  
  
Looking over to her previous dancing partner she saw him with yet another gal, this one with jetblack hair that had a nice bounce to it and legs that went on for days. She saw him licking up the nape of her neck as they danced and she felt how her chest fluttered at the boldness taking place so close by. Benny had told her to behave but she didn’t know what he considered to be good behavior. She felt his hand take ahold of her chin as he brought her face to look at him.

A stern expression and an equally stern voice telling her he didn’t appreciate sharing her attention.  
  
“Someone you know doll? Or are you just prone to lose focus.”  
  
His thumb grazed her lower lip and she flicked her tongue out to taste it before letting out a mischevious giggle. She thought she heard him groan but she couldn’t be sure.  
  
“I get bored easily is all, haven’t been in the same place too long for as long as I can remember and now you want me to sit pretty.”  
  
She whispered to him, pressing herself up against him to where she could keep a low tone of voice but still make sure he heard her.  
  
He lit a cigarette and took a drag of it before offering it to her, it was a small thing, sharing something from mouth to mouth like this, but as she took the cigarette and felt his warmth still lingering on it she shivered. She watched as his eyes focused intently on her movements as she embraced the cigarette with her lips. She was slow and deliberate since she knew his eyes were fixed on her. His touch, his gaze, his closeness, it was all intoxicating to her and she found herself not caring about anything else except the feeling of it.  
  
She let her head fall back as she breathed out the smoke, feeling herself relax in his arms, she became acutely aware that since she no longer shielded her chest he would very likely be able to see how hard her nipples had become and her awareness of it caused a masochistic thrill to shoot down her spine.  
  
In her peripheral vision she could see how he made a gesture for the other chairmen to leave them and she heard amused grumbles as they suddenly were left alone. She toyed with the thought that this was another part of a possessive nature he might have and the animalistic part of her loved it. The chairmen - and he for that matter knew her as a prostitute so why would he need to keep up appearances for them after all?  
  
Letting her head sink back down she met his eyes, his focus finally being only on her. She let out a chuckle as a thought snuck into her head and her voice sounded strangely sensual as she spoke  
  
“How about you Benny? Have you always lived your life here or do you get out sometimes?”  
  
The answer to that was one she of course already knew, clearly, but it didn’t make sense that if he had lived his life in the seclusion of the tops that he would just be able to run across the wasteland unbothered.  
  
“Nah doll, used to live like that too way back when we were still called the bootriders. But you’re exposed out there to whoever comes upon ya, House gave us an opportunity to set up shop here and the rest I think you can figure out all on your own honey baby.”  
  
“Bootriders? Sounds like tribals, you don’t look the part if you don’t mind my saying so.”  
  
He hummed in agreement with her statement before answering her

”Access to clean water does that to a man baby doll.”  
  
“Were you the leader back then too? Seems a little young to have been in charge for that long.”  
  
“Nah, challenged the old guy in charge to a knife fight. Should’ve seen the look on his face as I stuck it in his neck, since then I’ve been the big cat in charge.”  
  
She felt like she understood him slightly better then, it didn’t provide a clear picture of anything but it gave her a pattern of what drove him and she could bet it was that same drive that had cause her her fate. He sought power and that had been clear enough before him telling her, but it was a start.

She praised herself silently at this newfound information, she was apparently going in the right direction since he wouldn’t share anything at all earlier.  
  
“You good with your hands huh?”

She murmured as her fingers traced the side of his neck, now slightly damp from sweat but sensitive enough where she felt his hairs stand up in the wake of her touch.

Her smirk returned as she felt herself grow bold yet again, putting down her cigarette in the ashtray so she could free her hands, she was aching to touch him.  
  
The Cheshire like smile he gave her in return told her enough to know she was on the right track all right.  
  
“I ain’t one to brag, but you’ve already had a little taste after all, so maybe that’s a question I should allow you to answer for yourself baby.”  
  
His voice somehow sounded huskier, they were testing the waters with one another and sniffing eachother out.  
  
“Can’t say I remember quite clearly, maybe you could refresh my memory.”

She murmured, licking her lips knowing his eyes were following her every movement. Enlarged pupils tracing her face like the most important piece of art ever discovered.

  
He laughed quietly and pulled her calves from underneath her knees so she was sat like a little girl on her father’s lap. As that thought struck her she shivered, this was so deliciously wrong it had her growing wet.  
  
She closed her eyes shut tightly as she felt his fingers gently snaking their way back underneath her skirt, feather light touches that felt like shocks of electricity going straight to her core.  
  
“You really think you’ve earned that honey baby? You were after all misbehaving not too long ago, I had to bring you back like a misbehaving little girl. You really think you deserve to feel my fingers in that lovely cunt of yours again huh?”  
  
While biting down hard on her lip she looked up at him pleadingly, his dark eyes made her unsure but she could’ve sworn his pupils had grown bigger. But then she remembered herself, no, he was getting the upper hand and she wouldn’t allow it. Her body screamed at her to beg, to tell him pretty please if need be as long as he would be inside of her again. His fingers, tounge or cock, she wanted whatever he would give as long as it was him.  
  
“No..”  
  
Her voice came out like a whimper and she was silently cursing herself at the complete lack of dignity in her voice. She needed to turn this around somehow but she had to fight every fiber of her being to do so.  
  
“Good answer.”  
  
There was no time to process his words before he had pushed her down on the sofa so she was lying on her back with him seated between her legs.  
  
“What are you doing?”  
  
Another whimper came out of her as she felt his fingers trailing up and down her slit, her panties still separating their skin.  
  
“I’m keeping things exciting honey baby, wasn’t that what you wanted?”  
  
She shuddered as she felt his hand expertly unhook and pull off her garterbelt and underwear. She still had her stockings on but her core laid exposed before him and he let out a groan at the sight of her.  
  
“Ain’t you just the prettiest sight I ever did see, laying there spread out for me, such a shameless doll aint ya,”  
  
He rubbed his thumb on her clit causing her to shriek, it was so sensitive and his finger was rough on her. He picked up on her sensitivity so he used his pointer finger to collect some of her own juices to help his motions to become easier on her.  
  
She gasped as he returned his assault on her bud as well as two fingers playfully teasing her opening.  
  
There was a sickly pressure bubbling up inside her, he wasn’t as aggressive as he had been on the dancefloor, he was teasing her now after already having done so before and she hated how her body responded so strongly to his every touch.  
  
Looking over behind them she saw that the dancers were still going at it and she caught the eye of that man again, seeing him grin at the sight before him. She could only imagine what this looked like, she laid spread open with Benny inbetween her legs and anyone could clearly see his arm moving if they just took a good look.

Feeling herself grow helpless under his stare, his fingers entered her and expertly found its way back to that spot inside of her. She let out breathy moans that may or may not be overheard by anyone close by, she didn’t care anymore. The pressure building inside of her was so intense, he probably wouldn’t even have to be any good for her to get to this point _but oh he was, he was so good._ The filth, the feeling of how wrong it was, how degrading and humiliating this was on so many levels had her end speeding up deliciously fast.  
  
“Look at me doll.”  
  
As her eyes opened she met his, they were filled with lust and something she couldn’t place.  
  
“You see what this is baby? Anyone could walk by and see me violating this sopping wet cunt of yours, hear those pretty moans of yours and see you whoring yourself out to me. You like that? You’re probably longing for me to just fuck you at this point aint ya?”  
  
“N-no!”  
  
The last part of herself came crashing out of her, but it was still being held back by her bodys yearning for him. This was just his fucking fingers, what was wrong with her?!  
  
“Oh really? So you wouldn’t like it if I yanked those pretty legs of yours up on my shoulders, driving my cock deep into you in front of all these people? You wouldn’t like me tearing that dress of yours apart, laying you bare for all to see as I violate you?”  
  
Oh god, oh god, fuck, yes she wanted that so badly. She whined, a pathetic sound that he seemed to drink up like the best of wines. She wanted his cock so badly now, wanted him to claim her and show everyone she was his whore.  
  
“Fuck me, please fuck me Benny.”  
  
“Not yet.”  
  
She snapped back to reality and became furious, his fingers still doing their magic on her and her release not backing down a bit. But now she was pissed off on top of all of that, her body didn’t pay that any mind however and as he dipped his head down to lap with his tongue and suck on her clit she saw stars.  
  
It was so intense, so overwhelmingly good and she shuddered as it hit her and refused to stop. It hit in waves of pleasure making every part of her body feel almost painful. She wanted to pry him off but he was physically stronger as well as in the better position to control himself. A strange laughter escaped her at how absurd and wonderful it was.  
  
He finally let her go and she shuddered before she looked up at Benny again, and as she saw him grin at her she felt herself yearn for this demon as well as an even stronger need to end him.

 


	4. Strongbox of feelings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter I had some issues with, if you like it I would LOVE feedback on it. If you dont please be gentle but still give feedback.

Still in the aftershocks of her orgasm she reached for her undergarnments that he had unceremoniously thrown on the floor, but he beat her to it, pocketing the small threadlike thing and stashing her garterbelt under the couch.  
  
“Never liked those things anyhow, they only get in my way.” He muttered as he sat back again, picking up her still lit cigarette from the ashtray and taking another drag.  
  
Feeling like her legs were made of jelly she struggled to sit up, and as she did he offered her back her cigarette. She took the last drag that it could offer, tasting the filter of it by now but still needing anything she could to steady herself.  
  
Her anger still loomed inside of her but yet her body wasn’t functioning properly, high on its own euphoria.  
  
This whole endeavor wasn’t cutting it, he was getting the best of her and she felt that realization rise inside of her like a lump of fear and fury. Neither could be an option in this equation in order for her plan to fall through, there was no room for her to lose herself so fully.

He had shot her in the head before, only for the sake of covering his tracks. When he would find out the truth of who she was he would now be granted a more personal reason to try again. She couldn’t afford to lose focus, but her impulsive nature was proving to get in the way of her own survival.  
  
They sat there for a while, simply eyeing one other, Cherry felt the aftershocks of her orgasm hit her like small bolts of electricity and she felt self-conscious as he eyed her confidently.

She had never took a good look at him from such a close distance before, a strong jaw, dark eyes and bushy but seemingly well maintained eyebrows. His hair looked shiny and she could only assume if she tried to put her fingers in it it would feel just as crisp as her own overly styled do. He had strangely kind eyes, small lines framing them and making him look friendlier than she knew him to be. She felt herself falling and she needed to put a stop to it. She quietly asked herself if she’d always had such a stupid heart or if that too was a new development.  
  
Then she heard Swanks voice calling for him in the distance and she clicked her tongue in annoyance.  
  
“Duty calls doll.”

His voice sounded hesitant, maybe annoyed but Cherry didn’t feel quite as confident in reading him anymore.  
  
He left her with a half smirk and a wink, she felt somehow empty as she was left to her own thoughts. How could he simply brush things off? Was he made of steel? The prospect of being at his mercy in such a way was terrifying and she was ashamed at herself for losing her cool.

Falling back against the sofa, angered for the fact that she didn’t have a cigarette on hand. It felt clear that he had simply done what he did for the sake of reclaiming some sense of territory, to keep her in line. But now she felt empty, like she had been used and thrown to the curb. Why was this so complicated, men were _supposed_ to be simple but here he was, playing games.  
  
Wondering quietly how she was supposed to get through this alive, but as he left she heard the metallic sounds of a securitron rolling up to her with a familiar but unexpected face plastered over its screen.  
  
“I am pleased to see that you are giving yourself so fully to the assignment at hand, but dear Courier I would appreciate if you didn’t sully the name of this fine establishment further with such crude acts out in the open.”  
  
“Sell yourself to the man who shot you in the head, but don’t be trashy about it? You’re overestimating the power you hold over me House, and my patience is running thin.”  
  
The securitron served her a drink from the tray as not to seem overtly suspicious and she sipped the sparkling beverage with a low hum of approval at the anticipation of the oncoming release from her own thoughts.  
  
“My dear, as you said you are in fact selling yourself to this man on _my_ orders. You’re not in a position where I will expect much to be off the table in regards to your supposed _morals_.”  
  
Seeing red she went down to her high heels to retrieve something small before turning to the securitron, a shining bright smile on her lips.  
  
“What you seem to forget House is that in this new world of ours things such as chastity are overrated, if you are to survive your first and only priority is just that, survival.”  
  
She scanned the robot, assessing where the cords leading to its monitor might be located. But then as if she remembered her own limitations she simply used the butt of her swiss knife to bash it in. The securitron would no doubt be able to be fixed, but she wouldn’t need to hear another patronizing word out of the fossils dusty speakers.  
  
But his words had stung in the sense that she had thought about as much herself, she didn’t know what kind of woman she had been before all of this and those memories could’ve helped her an awful lot at this moment. Had she been a prude? Hardly, many of her thoughts felt instinctual, like a follow up of a backstory that had been long forgotten. She was as much a mystery to herself as to Benny.  
  
Her mind screamed after a cigarette, felt a strange yearning for it, it always had a way of calming her down and new vegas seemed to be overflowing with smokers but she couldn’t spot any.  
  
But then she realized to her own great horror that there was one man holding a lit one not too far away, that same man that had given her chills earlier – Nero, was that his name?  
  
Would it be a good idea to ask him for one? This was a public setting and she had been introduced as having arrived with Benny, not to mention House _needed_ her.  
  
She felt her need overtake her sense yet again, was this a trait of hers? She could only assume so, but it was so strange being fully aware of her own recklessness while at the same time allowing it to continue.  
  
“Mind if I have one?”  
  
He looked up at her as if he was a little jumpy, another dark eyed gentleman – although the gentleman part she was sure was far from true.  
  
“Sure doll, need a light too?”  
  
He fumbled in his jacketpocket and pulled out a long peculiar cigarette that was brown in color. A strange brand she thought to herself, thicker than the ones she was used to as well. Must be some kind of top shelf shit, but her brain longed for something to cool her down and he was smoking one himself so they couldn’t be too weird.  
  
As she bent herself forward he flipped his lighter, knowing full well he would have a full view of her chest. At this point she already felt like some kind of object so she didn’t mind his gaze.  
  
Taking a long drag and letting her head fall back, it felt like a sexual display somehow, her neck was exposed but that only spoke further to her self-destructive nature.  
  
_Get yourself an eyeful, if you show your cards it will be all the more delicious to kill you after this humiliation is over._  
  
Mumbling a quick thanks she went to leave when she felt his arm grasping around her waist. Of fucking course this wasn’t free.  
  
Falling down on his lap as she lost her balance, she found herself feeling at a loss, he wasn’t exactly gentle.  
  
“You know you look like one of my girls, Cachino doesn’t she look like this one broad we used to have around?” His voice was sweet as sugar but with an added bite underneath, he was used to be able to do as he pleased, that much was evident.  
  
“Yeah, what was her name? Can’t be this gal though, she’s much too young.”  
  
“You sure? Looks like her spitting image, fuck what was her name again.”  
  
“Something with M – I have it on the tip of my tongue.”  
  
“You’ve got the wrong gal I’m sure.” Cherry muttered, looking down at the cigarette and considering pressing the lit end right into his eye.  
  
“Marie? No, no, it was something longer than that.”  
  
She pulled herself up and made a display of her teeth, an animalistic response she couldn’t explain before she went to walk off.  
  
“Magdalena! That was her name!” He laughed, it was taunting, like he knew something she didn’t.  
  
Feeling a strange shudder run through her body, why did that name ring a bell? She couldn’t say she had a face to the name, but she was sure it was familiar to her.  
  
She stood still, back still turned on the men. Was the information worth the risk?  
  
“Where did she run off too? Haven’t seen her in about a decade or two.”  
  
Cachino’s voice was giddy, like he was enjoying the prospect of torturing her, she balled her hands into fists at her sides, wondering if it wasn’t within her rights to kill them off and she came to the conclusion that it probably wasn’t.  
  
“She had a daughter, a small thing, scrawny and with a bush of brown hair. Would’ve kept her in the family business but as soon as she first bled her and her mother as well as another girl up and disappeared. A shame that, two for the price of one and all that.”  
  
The world stopped, her vision became spotty in front of her eyes. It was like her brain was desperately trying to remember but it wouldn’t allow her the key to the safebox just yet.  
  
Her head was pounding, she took another drag of the cigarette, it acted as an anchor, keeping her down.  
  
Then she turned back towards the smirking men, offering them a blinding smile she didn’t feel like wearing.

Retracing her own steps back towards them in slow deliberate steps, she felt that she wanted to savor this moment.  
  
She took a firm hold of Nero’s chin, looking down into his still smug face, he felt safe in his numbers no doubt.  
  
“I’ve told you boys once and I’ll tell you once more. If you did know me, you would remember.”  
  
A loud hiss escaped Nero’s mouth and his men were up on their feet in no time. Cherry was pressing the cigarette onto the delicate skin at the top of his chest. He was gritting his teeth, seemingly trying to maintain his macho attitude.  
  
Releasing the cigarette from him, putting it out in his wineglass. Her eyes boring into his skull as if she could develop laser vision on the spot.  
  
“You’re playing a dangerous game here little girl.” He sputtered, his breathing jagged.  
  
Leaning into his ear, she couldn’t say why or where the words that would come out of her had come from but they did so nonetheless.  
  
“Be a good boy and don’t bother me again, I’m not one of your hookers and believe me when I tell you, I am out of your league.”  
  
Chuckling to herself, she felt like she wasn’t there anymore. She saw what was happening in front of her as if she was stood on the sidelines simply observing her body moving on autopilot. She felt safe somehow, like even if he would pull a gun on her and try to off her right then and there she would die knowing she hadn’t put her head down and that was all one could ask for death out here. That you faced it head on without regrets.  
  
His response was unexpected, he let out a hoarse chuckle that was mixed with some type of hiss. The pain and the scar he would no doubt develop seemingly pleasing to him. She backed up from him and let him go like he had turned into a nasty insect, she put in a mental note to make his end slow.  
  
“You’re her daughter alright, you’ve got that touch I’ve missed so much.”  
  
Her eyes focused like a scope on a glass, thinking of smashing it and pushing the broken stand into his throat. But her delicious fantasy was brought to a close by a familiar hand closing around her waist.  
  
“Now, now sugar, this any way to treat my _friends_ from work?” Benny’s voice was threatening but it had suddenly a more of a steadying effect on her. Right, she was here on a mission, couldn’t be stabbing people here and there right now.  
  
“Not to worry Benny, she just gave me a fiery peck is all.” Nero was back at trying to push buttons no doubt. Cherry’s eyes were drawn to the angry red dot at his neck, licking her lips thinking about the pain she would bring him in the future.  
  
“I wasn’t worried about you I assure you. If you can’t handle that much you wouldn’t have made it two days as a tribal after all.”  
  
Nero’s chuckle was mixed with annoyance now, they were like two bulls butting heads and Cherry felt like she had had enough of men for a lifetime from the experience of this night alone.  
  
“Come now doll, it’s time we head back.” Benny murmured in her ear as he led her towards the elevator.  
  
“Of course.” She muttered through gritted teeth


	5. Who's in charge here?

As they entered the elevator Cherry realized the other chairmen werent following along with them. She had avoided looking at Benny as they walked together for fear that her bottled up anger would take flight at the sight of his face.

As she felt the elevator sinking down towards the ground her stomach turned.  The eerie tickle in her lower stomach and the slight nausea of gravity making itself known was frightening all on its own without the aid of Benny, and the tiny box housing them was suddenly making her feel acutely claustrophobic.

 

The elevator stopped abruptly and she almost lost her footing at her own surprise. Regaining her momentum she found herself looking up to see Benny pushing down on the big red stop button. His eyes now bearing that familiar darkness that he had shown in his arousal, only now it held a different emotion - anger.

 

”I thought I told you not to stir shit up pussycat.” His voice now a low growl and once again she saw that yao guai she had pictured earlier in her mind.

 

_Can’t kill him but if he attacks first I should get to defend myself right?_

 

”I’m sorry I just asked him for a cigarette and then he just started acting weird.”

Her words were apologetic but her tone held the bite of defiance.

Determined not to put her head down for the likes of him she stared him down. A surge of confidence flooding her fuelled by the rage bubbling underneath the surface.

”That so? Using him as an ashtray was just what, casual conversation?” He continued

”He talked shit about my mother without being provoked, I say that gives me cause to skin him. You should be grateful I held back.”

She was tired of playing games with him, cold sweat ran down her back and she was clenching her fist to the point where her knuckles had turned white - this was bullshit, all of it.

He suddenly pounced on her, pressing his hand over her throat and pushing her up against the cool wall. His grip was firm but not quite focused on her windpipes. It was seemingly not meant to choke her out but rather he was displaying his power the way she knew coyotes to.

He was hovering above her, towering over her shorter frame. 

”You’re ballsy doll, now normally I do enjoy a dame with some kickass to her but youre getting in the way and like I said earlier - business comes first.”

His hand felt hot against her skin, it made her loins burn and horribly enough it made that overwhelming sensation of shame return.

Why was it that her body reacted this way to his touch, her mind found him appalling - a man that would gun down a woman that may or may not have been innocent.

But his touch was elecriticy, warmth and a disgusting desire for more of his naked skin against her body spread through her.

 

Even this was intoxicating, she found herself longing for him to tighten his grip around her throat and the thought of it had her breath speeding up. She felt filthy for feeling the way she did but that somehow just made it better.

 

A chuckle like a low rumble sounded from his chest. He mustve noticed her shameful reaction as she was rubbing her legs together for friction without thinking about it.

 

”Such a dirty pussycat aint ya, you’re getting off on this huh?”

His voice had lowered as he spoke again, as if he could taste her arousal by prolonging every word. Dark brown eyes intently boring into her as she worked against her own need.

 

She shot him daggers with her eyes, feeling rage mixed with shame at having been found out. As he talked she watched his lips, suddenly reminded of his tongue lapping at her cunt.

 

A sound came out of her that could only be described as a whine, and he tightened his grip around her throat in response.

 

”You remind me of my tribal days doll, a wild animal needs a firm hand. I was careless simply trusting you to behave, must’ve grown soft from this cozy living. Wont make that mistake again I can assure you. Precautions will have to be made for the next time, because you just cant seem to behave.”

 

”Fuck you.” She sputtered

 

Her voice hitched at the touch of his calloused hand once again making it way to her slit, pushing her skirt up like he had before.

 

He sneered as he no doubt felt how wet she was, how her body was loving every moment of this.

 

”Now, now doll. That any way to talk to your employer? I’ve been good to you, made sure that if you behave I’ll be the last John you’ll ever serve. But you’re acting a little too high and mighty for my taste.”

 

”Who said yours is a taste I aim to please huh? This is business, you’re just toying with me as a bonus.”

 

She gasped as his fingers entered her again, her body was burning all over and a part of her that grew by the second was desperate to just have him fuck her already.

 

”You’re right about that much pussycat and fuck if that ain’t a bonus worth every cap.”

 

The ding of the elevator turning back to life had him putting distance between them once again. An annoyed grunt letting her know he was enjoying this too. She was incredibly grateful for the abrupt end however. Mr House was the eyes and ears of this entire building and she didn’t enjoy the prospect of an audience... Atleast not an uninvited one.

 

* * *

 

As they returned their way to the tops she had made up her mind. She wouldn’t be a silent bystander anymore, this would end up with her in his arms and she refused to simply be swept away.

 

They walked into their suite and she moved to leave for the dressingroom.

 

She walked up to watch her reflection, bright eyes shining back at her. She felt beautiful, but also like she was about to do something dangerous.

 

Hugging onto herself, she felt queasy at the amount of feelings battling inside of her. Her dignity felt diminished and she needed to right this wrong. But in doing that in the way she yearned for she would do something she had no memory of ever doing before.

 

Going to her brought along briefcase and bringing out a second garter she felt like she was making a small rebellion, but a rebellion nonetheless. She heard the radio being turned on from the main room and she gritted her teeth.

 

Fastening her stockings once more she donned a bra made of lace that gave a small peak at her nipples. Stroking her hand along her stomach she gazed at her own reflection, finding herself reexploring her own physique. This body before her felt so unfamiliar, the scars clading her lacked the aid of her memories and it saddened her that she still felt like such a complete stranger to herself.

  

Hearing a light knock on the door she grumbled in annoyance, it wasn’t locked, didnt have a lock to begin with, so if Benny chose to just waltz in he could. But she was thankful for the small - if insignificant show of courtesy.

 

”You doin’ alright in there doll? Figured you might need the night to yourself. I was rough on ya earlier so I wouldn’t wanna force ya.”

 

She chuckled, a dry sound with no actual humor behind it. Was he trying to be nice so she would swoon after the treatment from before?

 

”It’s fine, just give me a minute would you?”

 

He didn’t answer, she had gone along with what she supposed to be a bluff. If she said no he was fully able to force her. She didn’t trust him not to, she didn’t know him after all.

 

She pulled some panties on, silently asking herself what the point of it was. He had seen her already. But she remembered somewhere from before how a tease was essential.

 

_Who the fuck am I?_

 

Was she the daughter of a prostitute? Nero had alluded to as much, but then again doppelgangers were a thing.

 

She clicked her tongue as she yanked the door open, walking out to see Benny sitting behind the bar. He was listening to the radio and drinking some sort of liquor, this was it. No way this wouldn’t end with her fucking him and she hated herself for it.

 

He looked up at the sound and looked over to her, an almost solemn expression on his face that turned into one of surprise.

 

Mr New Vegas buttery smooth voice rang through the suite:

_Witness descriptions are remarkably similar to accounts of the Goodsprings courier who, as we reported, recently survived a gunshot to the head._

  
She felt a grin creep up over her face, she suddenly recognized the face he had made - it was one of fear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Filth is upcoming my peeps, stay tuned


	6. From electricity to fire

A ghost looking for vengeance, thats who she felt like she were and god did it make her tingle realizing that this man - the man who thought of her as a common whore, was right under her thumb. Nothing he did from here on out would ultimately make a difference and her chastity wasn’t important. She would be the victor in the end and that was the simple truth, the only thing that mattered.

 

She swayed over to him, giving him a moment to take in the full vision of her. His mouth was fallen slightly open and she delighted in the sight. She felt like a femme fatale, giving him a taste of paradise before his inevitable decline into hell.

 

She went her way up to him, leaning over him where he sat, he still managed to be taller but she felt in control and that was all that mattered.

 

”Goddamn pussycat, a body like that... Shit you can’t put a prize on that.”

 

Was that supposed to be a compliment? Couldn’t he just shut that mouth already?

 

”That courier might be here any second to end ya baby, make love to me while we still can why dontcha.”

 

She did something she wasn’t supposed to, she sealed his lips with hers. Feeling him shudder as her tongue made its way into his mouth.

 

He tasted of liquor and cigarettes, like something dirty and wrong. She held onto his blazer, the same blazer he wore the night he shot her and she pulled it closer, the self destructiveness of it all only spurring her on further. Their tongues entwining in a filthy dance that resulted in noises that had her dripping.

 

Fuck she needed him inside of her right this second, the high of power combined with her animalistic lust was enough to have her come right then and there. His mouth against hers felt like electricity combined with the best hit of jet she could imagine all at the same time. It made time slow down and her body felt like it was caught on fire in the best way possible.

 

He pulled her close, disgustingly gentle, he squeezed her ass with his one hand and searched his way into her hair with the other - it was too intimate, she realized as soon as he did it.

 

She broke the kiss, ripping up his pants aggressively, this wasn’t going to be romantic and he fucking wouldn’t be allowed to play with her feelings.

 

She sank down to her knees, rough and most likely dirty carpet scraping against her knees. That was more like it, this animal urge with no hint of intimacy was what she needed.

 

She spared no time as his cock sprung free from its confines, he hissed as the air hit him but she didn’t allow him time to get used to it before she devoured his length.

 

She bobbed her head up and down in motion with her stroking of his shaft, fondling his balls at the same time with her opposite hand. It was almost as if she was milking him and she felt him growing in her mouth. A small part of her wished he would simply finish in her then and there so she could regain her own common sense.

 

As he grew further in her mouth she realized how big he was, she purred as she felt him hitting the back of her mouth, some of his shaft still not fitting inside of her.

His hand made its way into her hair, gripping onto her head to fuck her mouth. It hurt a little bit since her hair was sealed with enough hairspray to further harm the ozone layer. But that was what she craved, none of that tender shit. She felt a little self conscious regarding him finding the indent of a bullet however. But luckily he didn’t seem to notice it as he gripped ahold of light locks still unfamiliar to herself.

 

She sped her pace up, delighting in the salty taste of his precum as if it was the most delicious of aphrodisiacs. But then he stopped her in her tracks, his grip tightening and she felt angry. She knew what that meant and she knew that would have the potential to change everything.

 

She looked up at him and saw him raise his eyebrow and lick his lips. He had clearly noticed her frustration and it seemed to amuse him.

 

“Bed. Now.”

 

She let out a small grunt as she secretly wished for a shot of whiskey to take the edge off of all of this bullshit. She needed to keep in control, this was uncharted territory for her as far as she knew, she didn’t know her own age nor her own sexual experience. Was he her first? Probably not, she had guessed her own age to be around 25 and in this wasteland people seemed to start having sex real early.

 

She stood up and dragged her fingers along his strong jawline, looking down into his dark eyes. Snaking her way around him and stroking along his shoulder as she left for the large bed, allowing him a good look at her body.

 

She laid down on the bed, back against the mattress, legs playfully crossing in the air.

 

He stood at the edge of the bed, looking down at her and stroking along her one leg. It was like a reminder of earlier that night and she felt her core burn at his touch. It remained horribly intimate, disgustingly delicious. He took ahold of her heel clad foot, kissing up her ankle and letting his other hand snake over her stomach as he went down to his knees.

 

“You make for such a pretty picture doll, laid out in all this pretty lingerie for little old me?”

 

She bit her lower lip, was he making this shit about how she felt about him? It felt egocentric of him, he assumed her to be a stranger after all.

 

He made his way on top of her, removing her garter once more and then her panties. She felt so innocent right then, they were face to face and all alone together.

 

Her body burned, she wanted to have something to focus on so that she wouldn’t be simple putty in his hands. Couldn’t allow him to take the reigns this much. She leaned forward, pulled his blazer back and let it fall to the floor, then she unbuttoned his shirt.

 

His skin was eerily soft, dark and peppered with small freckles along his broad shoulders. She was caught up in her passion for him as she kissed them, following their natural trail down up to his jaw.

 

He pushed her back, a little too softly for her to not feel that burn of something she didn’t want to feel creep up. He made his way down between her legs again with his mouth, she was naked from the waist down now apart from her stockings and heels. She gasped as his tongue hit it’s intended target, his breath was like fire on her folds.

 

“You’re practically dripping for me pussycat. Is this just from now or can I indulge my ego and assume you’ve longed for me since last time?”

 

“You talk too much.” She growled

 

She knew right then that if she was a Gomorrah girl what she was about to do was off limits, but then again as far as she knew she wasn’t one.

 

She pressed his face against her folds, shutting him up and gasping loudly at the powerless groan he let out as his mouth devoured her.

 

She shut her eyes as she felt him eating her out, sucking on her clit and lapping up her folds to suck on them lightly, like they were the most delicious of treats.

 

She lost control, too caught up in what he was doing she pulled his head closer and mewled, stroking along her breasts on the inside of her bra. This was too good, he was too good. His touch had been electricity before, now it was fire. She felt a tinge of paint at his hands, tongue, his touch against her naked flesh. Her skin was overtly sensitive and it was like she felt everything clearer.

 

She felt her own end coming along, she didn’t want it just yet, she needed that annoyance of getting close but not finishing for this to have the desired effect. If she finished her own orgasm she would be overly sensitive, it wouldn’t taste as sweet when he opened her up with his shaft. She had a thought that had her grinning, she brought her hand into his hair to stop him. He looked up, his mouth slightly shinier than before and she grinned at the sight.

 

“Let me keep my frustration baby, I want you inside me already.”

 

He gave her a smug smile before they both removed the remainder of their clothing. Cherry chose to leave her heels on, they made her feel powerful and she had a small appreciative look at them before Benny spread her legs and settled inbetween them.

 

She hissed as she felt the head of his cock teasing along her opening. She was slick enough that he probably would be able to sink in easily, but she felt a small pang of fear at the thought of it.

 

“You ready doll?” He whispered, his eyes foggy and unfocused as he put one of her legs on his shoulder.

 

She couldn’t speak, it was all just too much, her body was on fire and his dishevelled hair somehow made him look all the more incredible. She did something she knew she shouldn’t and raised herself up some to seal his lips with hers. He groaned appreciatively and deepened their kiss as he sank into her wet heat.

 

She gasped but it was muffled by his mouth as she sank back with him. It was too intimate, too much for her to handle having him inside her and face to face like this. But she needed it, it was too good to pass up and she wouldn’t allow anything to disrupt it.

 

He wasn’t yet fully inside, the few months she had in memory had been without any sex so it felt like her body was fighting him even though she was soaked.

 

“Come on now babygirl, let me in.” His voice was low and husky, making her shudder and then moan at the sound of it and her distraction gave him a little time to fully sheathe himself inside of her.

 

He growled, an animalistic sound that made her squeeze down hard on him. His naked skin against hers was so intoxicating enough, but having him inside her this way, until she felt she could take no more, it was positively sinful.

 

She had a hard time breathing, her body felt like it was on fire but the slight pain at the intrusion had her forcefully breathing more slowly to cope.

 

He kissed up and down her ankle, removing one of her shoes and licking along the top of her foot as he pulled his cock out until only the tip remained inside her. The softness of his tongue along the thin skin of the top of her foot had her back arching and she gasped.

 

She drew in a deep breath, feeling herself giving into the feeling of ecstasy and helplessness as he slammed back into her. Her leg on his shoulder made him go in so deep into her she felt like she might break.

 

He hovered over her, becoming all she could see as she opened her eyes. His eyes were even darker than usual, there was something about him that had her gut instinct screaming for her to run away. But that only added to her ecstacy as she pulled his face towards hers to reclaim his mouth.

 

He rewarded her with a husky groan that had her cunt clamping down on him yet again.

He let go of her leg and she yelped as he pulled her up to sit on his lap, her legs now on either side of him as he thrust into her. This was too much, she wouldn’t last another minute like this. He was everywhere, holding her tight against him, his lips devouring her neck as he fucked her. She whined and leaned her head back, her hand on his neck for support as she moved her hips to meet his thrusts.

 

She felt his tongue inbetween her breasts, lapping up the small beads of sweat that had accumulated there.

 

She gritted her teeth tightly together as she felt that delicious pleasure building up to a peak again.

 

She had lost the ability to speak, couldn’t make a proper sentence if her life depended on it. He was too good, he felt so perfect inside of her.

 

”Please, please, please” was all she managed to stutter out, not fully knowing what it was she was asking for.

 

She looked up at him, pleading eyes meeting his glazed over cocky ones. His mouth turned into a lazy halfsmirk.

 

She let out a screech as she felt his thumb and pointerfinger close down over her clit. She felt like it should have hurt but she was so far gone in her pleasure that it felt just perfect.

 

”Let me hear you begging real pretty for me, tell me what you want. Let me know what you’re willing to do for it huh?”

 

She mewled, annoyed and so horrendously close.

 

The panting and lewd sounds of their coupling filled the room.It was too much, too delicious a feeling to have him pounding into her this way. She felt her end closing in put as if he somehow knew that was happening he slowed down.

 

She growled and gave him a look of anger that she was conviced didn’t look anywhere near as threatening now.

 

Her pride didn’t want to give in, but she wasn’t driven by pride more than she was her own personal pleasure anymore.

 

”I’m so fucking close Benny, please, I want to come on your cock. Please Benny I fucking need it, I need you.”

 

He made an expression that was probably meant to be cocky, but he looked like he was losing his own control. That’s when the truth of his games sank into her, he was just as aware of this powerplay as she was.

 

She snaked her arm down in between them and cupped his balls again. Hearing him shudder deliciously as his thrusts picked up their previous speed.

 

She felt filthy, but in the most wonderful of ways. She felt his muscles tense underneath her, his hot skin against hers. She felt him working her clit now, the way he did back when there were people around. It was like he knew her body already, it had her shaking and she felt that wonderful tickling sensation building up inside of her until finally it felt like something snapped. She saw stars and she thought she heard him growl again as he slowed down his pace not to overwork her oversensitive body, fucking her through her orgasm.

 

She fell down on her back, the strength of her body giving out at the relief of her release.

 

His pace picked up again, slowly so as not to make her hurt. But she felt any touch at all was on the verge of being too much at this point. She met his thrusts with her hips in response still. She felt this strange urge overcome her, it was like she couldn’t get enough of him.

 

She reached herself up again, putting her arm around his neck and pulling him down with her. He followed suit, steadying himself on his arms as he continued what was now a brutal pace.

 

She snaked her tongue against his, sucking on it and hearing him make a sound that had her snaking her legs around his back to draw him in further.

 

She broke the kiss, licking up and down on the side of his ear, feeling him shudder and speed up even more. She mewled into his ear, it was so good, so perfect all of it.

 

He seemed to be close, his muscles tensing and relaxing underneath her touch. She was overwhelmed with a feeling she was bound to regret later on, but for now she didn’t care.

 

”Come inside me, please Benny baby. Please fill me up.”

 

He stopped in his tracks, not creating any space between as he laid lodged inside of her.

 

”Don’t think thats a good idea doll, wouldn’t want the lines to get blurred and all.”

 

His breath was shakey as he resumed his pace, fast and hard. It was as if both of them had some delusion about this sex being just an act.

 

She felt fury bubble up inside of her at his response. Blur the lines? What did that even mean at this point?

 

He sealed her lips with his and she let out a surprised moan at the unexpected contact.

 

”If you behave tomorrow I will give you whatever you want doll. Your word will be my command. How about that?”

 

She let out a happy purr as she met his hips with her own more furiously. The pain and the pleasure made for the most gorgeous of pleasures and she wanted more. It felt like his body had been molded to fit hers and she couldn’t get enough of him.

 

She felt him shudder before he pulled out and came on her stomach. She whined as she felt the chill of air replace his closeness. Wanting him back inside as soon as he left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey I'm curious, would yall like this to become a fluff fic or a multiship fic? I'm torn inbetween the two and I feel like either would work


	7. Simone

They laid there together for a little while, catching their breaths, closely pressed to one another as if they were more than they were.  
She felt herself dancing on the line of what was a reasonable amount of closeness for this mission of hers.

Her head was on his arm as he held her. She realized he had a scent to him, like smoke mixed with something she could only describe as masculine yet sweet all the same. Such a strange combination, but she felt herself leaning into it. But this was becoming dangerous for her and she needed to get a fucking grip on herself already.

Catching herself she broke contact from him abruptly, causing him to make a disappointed growl to which she responded with a demure chuckle.  
  
Benny went to leave and returned with a rag for Cherry to clean herself off with, it felt a little strange all of it. Going from having hot steamy sex to this… Uncomfortable silence.

After cleaning herself off she put her underwear back on, discarding the rag to a nearby end table. As she dressed this time she left the garter on the floor. Hearing Benny muttering approvingly as a result as he had clearly noticed her remembering his instructions.  
  
She heard Benny leave for the bathroom, the air around him was changed too. He seemed like he was so in control for most of the time but right now it was as if they were both equals, two people who didn’t quite know what to make of what had just happened between them. It felt like more than a simple exchanging of… Services.  
  
What horrified Cherry the most was this unknown urge for him to finish inside of her, the idea had slipped out of her in the heat of the moment. She couldn’t explain it, didn’t understand it and what made her shiver the most was that he had more or less given her a promise that he would, given that she behaved for the next outing. They hadn’t discussed any kind of protection, she was supposed to be new to the Gomorrah and all but that didn’t mean anything as far as safety went. Did he just trust her to be safe? Then again sexually transmitted diseases in this land we’re easy enough to fix, people could be turned into cyborgs out here after all so curing the clap would be an easy thing she supposed. But that didn’t cancel out the chance of pregnancy fully, there were so many questions about this interaction and she couldn’t fathom what had made her say what she did.  
  
It felt easy enough to explain away her own silliness, she knew herself to grow attached too easily despite her trust issues, it was as if her emotions had balled up into a great big orb of confusion which she had no memories to explain, had they always been this tumultuous? This was becoming more of a challenge by the second and she cursed herself for not leaving, for spurring it on and initiating it.  
  
As she rose from the bed she massaged her temples as if that would somehow make her focus return, throwing glances over to the door to make sure Benny couldn’t see in to her. What was this mind of hers? She was so set on killing him one second and the next she… What? Wanted to start a family with him or some dumb shit? The old sheets had felt like silk when they had embraced but now they felt dirty, rough on the skin and like a crime scene that someone had thought to throw a blanket over.  
  
Swallowing her thoughts and making her way to her feet she desperately worked to steady her mind, there was no time for this shit now. She would simply have to go find a doctor, this wasn’t something she could just think on hard enough and then suddenly understand anyhow.  
her stomach.  
_  
This your idea of courtship? He put a bullet in your brain, but oh he did remember what drink you like so of course, who WOULDN’T forgive him._

Leaving for the bar she decided on getting a bottle of wine, wine had the lovely effect of turning any feeling into a pleasant buzz, or anger. But either or would do fabulously right now, her first find was a dark green bottle speckled with dust and various stains of questionable nature - the spices of the wasteland. She squinted to look for any sign of its coloring before giving up and pulling forcefully at the cork which in turn made a loud pop - great, it was red, now she would be exposed for the heathen she was, she hated red wine.

She heard Benny coming out from the bathroom and getting dressed as she took her first swig straight from the bottle. Winching at the bitter taste she tried her best to keep it down despite her body's protests, it was probably valuable for having been preserved for so long but god that didn’t seem to help the taste now did it? She told herself again and again in her head that it was expensive as if that fact alone was cause to drink it all, she took another swig and saw Benny entering the room, fiddling with his tie, and his eyes opened wide at the sight she must be.

Must've made for a confusing picture, there she was dressed like she was high class with her expensive pre-war lingerie, but she was swinging a bottle of fine wine back like it was cheap whiskey. She realized she must look trashy as all hell and she gave him a mischievous smirk and a wink as she sat down on the barstool behind her and continued her chugging.

The laughter rumbling out of him had her chest fluttering in a way she hated. Couldn’t he atleast insult her so atleast one of ’em was keeping the line nice and clear.

”You’re a piece of work ain’t ya doll?” He muttered, his tone low and husky yet somehow it made her think it sounded insecure despite what she gathered was a feigned attempt to maintain his suave persona.

She didn’t answer, instead feeling a genuine smile overtake her face which she promptly turned away from him. He felt more human to her somehow, which made her happy as much as it made her feel conflicted.

Whether he noticed or not she couldn’t tell, but she soon heard him pouring himself a drink from behind her. She felt strangely shy all of a sudden so she looked back down at the label of the bottle. It was faded enough where it was hard to make out the words, but as she stroked along the faint lettering something stuck out to her. The wine had a name she could barely make out - Simone?

The name felt familiar, like it meant something to her and she felt a vague memory entering her mind.

_Red hair streaked with gray, broad steady shoulders on a woman clad in a dark green parka with a sniper rifle strapped across her back and dark boots scuffed from walking for ages._

_”Keep a lookout why dontcha flower? Don’t let nothin’ sneak up on me when I’m not lookin’. Shout if you find that label I told ya about anywhere, she said it’s called Simon or some shit.”_

She was brought back to reality by a big hand waving in front of her eyes and out of reflex she went for the knife usually secured in her pocket only to come up emptyhanded.

”Did I tucker you out already dollface or have you just had too much to drink already? You’ve got that technique of a gal that can hold her sauce if ya don’t mind my saying so.”

Wanting to maintain her cool she took another swig as if that would do the trick quickly, fuck, should've brought some jet or something. In front of her eyes it was as if she saw red, this was all this fuckers fault. She knew the memory to be fond to her, but yet she couldn’t remember the name of the woman, her significance in her life and It was all this mans fault.  
  
Anger filled her chest, spilling over piece by piece as they mixed with her own sadness at not being able to place her own past. She felt he had stolen something invaluable from her and he was still stealing from her by touching her heart. She grumbled and turned away from him, chugging back more of the disgusting red liquid. Now she couldn’t even bet on being too drunk to escape, she couldn’t risk becoming loose lipped but she also felt like every second spent with him now only served to harm her further.  
  
Words came out of her mouth like a projectile vomit, she was feeling hurt and she wanted him to hurt too right then.  
  
“So how do you intend to pay me, you’ve mentioned buying me out but travelling with a lot of caps will be hard _baby._ ”  
  
Her words felt like venom, she hated herself for saying them, she felt dirtied by them and she could tell by his harsh contained expression she had managed to hit her intended target.  
His mouth became a hard line for a fragment of a second as he went away to grab his blazer, pulling it on without answering her.  
  
He answered with his back still to her “I don’t like mixing business with pleasure honey baby, but I’ll go talk to the boys about how to find a solution to your problem okay?”  
  
A lump formed in her throat, a large part of her wanted to take back her words. She knew them to be justified but he didn’t have all the facts, didn’t know who she was. Fuck, what was she even supposed to do with herself.  
As she watched him walking to the door, she knew she needed to stop him if she didn’t want to do lasting damage. But she couldn’t move to stop him, couldn’t do that to herself more so than to him.  
  
“When will you be back?” She muttered, her tone betraying the vulnerability in her question.

“It’s none of your concern doll, don’t wait up.”

  
His voice was flat as he answered, like whatever he might have felt before was gone out the window. She knew she had burned the bridge they had begun to form and part of her felt like she wanted to cry as a result. Why the fuck did she feel this much after knowing him for less than a day?  
Her tears balled up into a pit in her chest, why was this happening? It seemed to clearcut in her head before all of this.  
  
Hearing the door closing behind him she slammed the bottle in her hand against the barcounter, feeling the shatter of glass and cold fluids cover her body. Shard cut into her hand and she knew she was bleeding. She felt a strange relief from it, she wouldn’t allow herself to cry so pain was all the relief she could hope for.  
  
She stared down at the mess and felt herself grow numb, this was all she could hope to do. She couldn’t allow this bullshit to continue, she needed to end him when all of this was over after all. Revenge was all she had to live for now and living happily ever after with the scumbag that left her to die and stole her life wouldn’t be an option. But why did it have to hurt so badly, why couldn’t something be easy just this once.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also I edited this chapter because I fully fucked up the writing of it originally so HOPEFULLY most of you didnt have to read the first edition of this shitshow lol.
> 
> Also shoutout to red-rosa on tumblr for helping me out with the editing!!


	8. The whore

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts are in cursive!

Benny huffed as he pressed the elevator button to return to the lobby.

 _This fucking broad is something else isn’t she, either she’s a loose cannon or she just doesn’t have any good sense for how to behave._ _This is what I get for letting Swank do the pickin’ I suppose, gonna have to have a lil’ chat with him about that._  
  
He lit another cigarette, frustrated by how this broad had managed to get under his skin. He wasn’t one to become this lost on a pair of such pretty… Eyes.  
  
Another thought he had trouble shaking was where he had seen that strange tattoo of hers before. He had spied it during their first meeting but he couldn’t quite place it. He knew the symbol alright, any person that’d spent time in a casino knew it. But it seemed annoyingly familiar and he was pissed at not remembering where his mind was trying to direct him.  
  
The elevator dinged as he reached his intended floor, he more or less stormed out of the elevator before remembering his role.

 _Right, smooth sailing, nice and easy, nothing bothers the Ben-man, can’t let the guys see me sweat.  
  
_ It was clear enough she had gotten to him, ruffled his feathers or whatever and that couldn’t happen again. Her bad bedside manner may have been a sting to his ego, but It put his focus back where it belonged.  
  
_Shit, should’ve gotten her out of there, can’t work with that clank of metal with the smiley face with her there._  
  
  
  
After being thrown out of the suite (well to be fair after the way Swank had worded it she had just been reassigned to another suite for the night) she was once again dolled up and heading out.

If she was honest with herself it was helpful to her state of mind, that whole room reminded her of him and she felt a need to clear her head. She had left her bag in her new smaller room and then changed before heading out. She had a new mission in her mind, one that she hoped would dull her from there on out.  
   
  
Walking along the strip, she was donned in tight clothes fitted snugly along her form, she had more or less snuck out, another disguise in store helping her to leave unnoticed.  
  
She knew where she was headed and she felt nauseous at the thought of it. But the one part of her subconscious that she was still allowed access to screamed at her that it was the one place she could find answers.

 

The loud music from the Gomorrah blasted loudly enough that she could swear she was feeling the ground shake beneath her.

She had donned a different dress but this one was much more conservative, she wouldn’t look like she was for sale, but if she were she would probably be charging top dollar and specializing in something perticularly filthy. This one was a light off-green, it made her feel expensive somehow. It had a low-cut boatneck and it went up at the side just above her one knee, not too much but just enough, mauve lipstick and a sharp cateye making her look more sultry, harsh almost.

She strode up to the place, her uncomfortably tall heels snagging to the rough asphalt, but somehow she made it without tripping nonetheless. She would’ve preferred her travelling gear over all of this, she didn’t feel right being so restrained.  
  
_I fucking hate heels, put your weight on the front of your foot, and don’t count on support from something so small._

Just like with men, she came to think before snorting to herself – her chuckle at her own thought temporarily numbing the pain she felt in her toes.

She recognized a bright ginger hairdo on a tanned freckled girl, donned in a black latex outfit and having a smoke break in full view of passersby. It was the girl that had been given the job initially and her name was Marissa. The girl recognized Cherry and waved enthusiastically for her to come over.

”Hey babe! Hows it goin’ with that bigshot?”

Marissa’s highpitched voice managed to ring through the music somehow, it was pleasant to her ears and had her shoulders relaxing.

The redhead took a long drag of her cigarette after she spoke, making Cherry aware of her long fingernails as she strode up to meet her. What was it about beauty standards for women making living in general harder overall?

The other woman pulled Cherry into a familiar warm hug, her tight latex dress squeaking from the added pressure.

”Oh ya know, as good as can be expected.” Cherry murmured into her sweet smelling red locks

”Aw baby, he aint into that rough shit is he? You need to charge extra if that’s the case, wouldn’t wanna make him think you don’t know the ropes. Oh, haha, and speaking of which, if ropes are involved you better double the fee, unless it’s him being tied up! Then you better give him back to me, those jobs are fun!” She winked and let out a bubbly giggle that felt contagious.

Marissa was so bubbly and full of life, Cherry felt something motherly inside of her feeling the need to protect her. But this was a grown woman, it would be downright arrogant to assume Cherry somehow knew any better. Especially after this night, which if nothing else only proved that she absolutely didn’t.

”I need to have a chat with you actually, can I buy some of your time so I don’t get ya into trouble for it?”

Marissa let out another bubbly laugh as she gestured for the other woman to follow.

”Of course sweetie, let’s go back inside why don’t we? I could use a cocktail anyhow!”

  
  
She was lead into the bar area, where there were working girls and guys dancing on the stage. The air was thick and smelled of dust and mold. She hated this place, it felt like a gilded cage that hadn’t been cleaned in about 200 years.

She was by habit sat on a chair by the wall as Marissa returned with some brightly colored drinks and sat down next to her.

”So what do you wanna talk about sugar? You need any tips or anything?” Marissa giggled before she took a sip of her own drink. The brightly colored green straw a stark contrast to the red lipstick she wore.

”Well, yes, you see I’m sort of... Well fuck how do I even put this...” The blonde murmured

Marissa’s eyes lit up as if she had read the other woman’s thoughts.

”Are you falling for him babe?” The other woman’s smile was so bright it took the sting off of the very loaded question, she hated how true it seemed to ring in her chest.

”I mean, I’m not NOT falling for him.” Cherry muttered into her glass

She couldn’t make herself say the words out loud, she could hardly admit it to herself after all.

”Aw sweetie, can’t have you workin’ in those conditions, you need to put a stop to that, and quick!”

Marissa looked sympathetic and put her hand on Cherry’s knee. Eyeing over towards the bartender who seemed to be keeping a keen eye on them.

”How do I do that?” Cherry’s voice came out as a hiss, annoyed by her own emotional state.  
  
Another bubbly giggle escaped the redhead, it was like those giggles acted as shields, protecting them both from how uncomfortable of a subject it was.  
  
“You need to fuck someone you despise, it makes your mind numb enough, I think Dina explained it as some kinda reset button. If you feel filthy enough your brain sorta takes over, anything to keep going eh?”  
  
Cherry felt slightly horrified by the tone in which she had said it, why did she talk about it as casually as where to throw away garbage or buy gear? She felt a lump in her stomach form, not for the sake of herself fucking someone she despised, but moreso that judging by the other womans tone, she had already done so.  
  
“I don’t know anyone that I despise at the moment that I think I would be able to fuck… But thanks, I’ll keep that in mind babe.” Cherry muttered into her glass as she swung it back.  
  
Marissa took a firm hold of her hand, making Cherry cough into her glass, _damn her hands were soft._  
  
“Honey, this is a brothel, if you spend more than 30 minutes here you’re gonna find someone you wanna poke your eyes out after meeting. Just find the sleaziest one and stick to his presence for 20 minutes. It should put you off men for a lifetime if you’re lucky, two if you play your cards well enough.”  
  
Cherry gulped, what the other woman had said made sense in a twisted kind of way. She needed to fix this emotional turmoil problem and to her knowledge this was her best shot. She scanned the room, only seeing the dancers on the stage at first, and then scanning the small crowd gathered close by it. None of these people she felt would fit the bill, they were mostly NCR officers or workers on their night off. They wouldn’t tick her off as much as they would bore her, it felt like a wild goose chase waiting to happen.  
  
Then something struck her mind, a crazy thought but one that would serve two purposes. She could seek out Nero, he seemed to have a hunch regarding who she’d been before, and his presence alone felt somehow… Violating.  
  
It would serve its purpose, he would no doubt make her feel filthy and she hoped that would trigger her more lizard like mind to come into play.  
  
She thanked Marissa for her time and left that pouch of caps Benny had given her that first day to compensate for her time. Not waiting to see the other woman’s reaction before heading to the bartender, she needed to find the office of a certain someone.  
  
  
  
Nero was a man who basked in his own sense of control, he had two girls with him that night. Being so fired up from that bitch at the 38 with the familiar face he felt in need of release.

Magdalenas kid – oh how he yearned to have her under him. He remembered her mother, a very picturesque type of gal who had his father swooning all over her. She was like a mother figure to him in a twisted sort of way – but she was still a whore.

Whores were no more than property to him, his dad had always told him as much, but he always saw how he had glanced at Maggie. A pathetic sorta face that Nero had reminded himself again and again never to be in a position to make. Women made you weak if you let them in close enough. Women were created to serve men and as a younger man making his living as a big shot in the one true brothel of the strip he’d learned never to give the goods the time of day.  
  
He entered the first one forcefully, hearing her hiss at the sudden entrance, the people he brought to his suite were all made to know their place. No foreplay, he was the one in charge and they had to be aware of as much. It was a small comfort for them perhaps, knowing how he liked things would atleast exclude the possibility of surprise. He would give them the rest of the night off after he was done, a small mercy for these drugged up shells of people he liked to keep close by.  
  
The other woman kissed the one he was pounding into, no doubt trying to entice him further. But he felt nothing, this wasn’t who he wanted to humiliate, this wasn’t that fucking bitch who’s mark still burned at the base of his neck.  
  
_Wanna fucking kill that bitch, slice her up real pretty for one of those fucking flicks._

Yeah, that’d teach her and he’d keep that vid for himself, to use as an example for any other of these cattle to remind ‘em what happened when you crossed the boss.

  
  
A loud bang at the door had him stopping in his tracks, the girls ignored it - must be used to an audience with what how the Gomorrah worked. He pulled out unceremoniously, earning a low whine from the woman beneath him, it had sounded appreciative. Bitch didn’t know how lucky she was, he made a mental note to remind her as he returned.  
  
He pulled a robe on quickly, his guys knew well enough not to interrupt his downtime unless it was a life or death type of situation.  
  
The banging of the door insisted and he shouted at it in his anger. “Just a minute you fucker!”  
  
He went over to his desk to grab his revolver before heading to the door, whoever had the gall to interrupt him were in for a bullet to the brain that much he knew for sure.  
  
As he opened the door his breath got caught in his throat, what the fuck was she doing here.  
  
“OUT!” He shouted  
  
She shrunk back slightly at the unexpected sound and he waved at her to let her know it wasn’t her he was _talking_ to. A nice reaction that though, seeing her falling back a little bit.  
  
“Gals, you’re dismissed, drink or eat whatever you want for the rest of the night alright? It’s my treat, I’ve got a special visitor.” He felt giddy at this, had thought before how to lure her over there but here she was, ready like a freshly skinned gecko.  
  
  
  
Cherry’s breath caught in her throat as she saw two women making their way out of his room, looking like they were happy for her interrupting them but somehow sympathetic at the same time. Yes,this would do the trick alright based off of their expressions if nothing else.  
  
She waited for her cue, her swiss army knife stuffed within a suspender she had re-donned for the occasion. _Don’t waste bullets unless your target has earned the mercy of a swift death._ Another memory resurfacing as she stroked the outline of her knife on the side of her thigh.  
  
Nero waved for her to follow and she obliged, feeling her anger growing by the second. _Fucking men alright_ , Marissa had her head screwed on right that much was obvious.  
  
She walked in, taking slow strides to make herself seem in control, but she knew that if he was familiar enough with these people he might be able to see right through it. He didn’t intimidate her, she just knew he would be another type of John than Benny had been. The type to prioritize pride and his own masculinity, those Johns were even easier.  
  
She walked into his room, the dress she had thought of as classy felt all the more whorish under his gaze, he sat down in a  placed in the front and center of the room as if this was his routine. Like she was a priced brahmin being appraised by a farmer.  
  
“Do a little twirl for me before you open that sweet mouth of yours babe. I need ammunition to feign interest in anything apart from ripping your throat out after all.” He had sat down and had pulled out a box of those weird cigars from his suitpocket once more. It made her feel the need to grit her teeth, well in all honesty it made her feel the need to suppress simply killing him on the spot.

Somewhere in the back of her mind she remembered someone telling her “the men who want to seem like they are in control are the ones with the primal need to be dominated deep down.”  
  
She went with that instinct, feeling it to be a good enough middle ground between what she wanted and what he might want. She stopped trying to be demure, stopped playing any type of games as she almost sprinted at him, standing with her heeled foot in between his spread legs. His robe fell open at the sudden intrusion and she saw the slight glistening of his cock which was still hard. He’d just fucked one of those women had he? But he hadn’t finished yet apparently, perfect.  
  
She grinned as she heard him let out a small whine, her heel was pointy enough to cause pain if she simply pushed down hard enough.  
  
“Now you listen here _boy_ , I am here to find out what you know about my supposed ma. If you’re a good boy I might just reward you. But if you’re gonna keep up this little boy façade of being in control I may just have to kill you off.”  
  
His breath hitched and she could hear it, a delicious sound that half affirmed her power over him, but from how he shivered she gathered that wherever her information may have come from it was true for this scumbag.  
  
“You wouldn’t dare you fucking whore.” He breathed those words between his teeth, somehow testing her and she recognized it while he did it.  
  
She grinned at him, somehow familiar with this game he was initiating. She pressed her heel against him harder. Oh how she felt a rush from knowing she could rip it from him in no time. Yes, this was what she had wanted from her encounter with Benny, if only he had been a good predictable boy like this one.  
  
“Whos truly the whore here Nero. You’re the one twitching at your recognition of my control. You look like you’re ready to burst just by me pressing my heel against your most prized possession. Something tells me you’re liking being a little bitch under my command, even though your mouth may sound smart we both know better. You’re the true whore here, not me and I’m betting you’re a stupid one to boot, lucky for you that’s just how I like my whores.”  
  
They continued in silence, Cherry searched about the overly decorated room with her eyes, this was a man who wanted to express his power above all else. Which only underlined her first impression, she shot a glance back over to him, his open robe exposing that angry red mark she had left him. She licked her lips at the sight, it was as far as she had been allowed to go at the 38 but here, oh here it was simply about getting away without being caught. What was it that Marissa had said? 20 minutes?  
  
She glanced down at the pip boy still attached to her arm and set a timer, testing her newfound friends theory.  
  
“Now, you were saying something about my ma? You know this face of mine huh? How about I make you better acquainted with it so you can tell whatever gods you might meet in hell who brought you your end?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for any potential grammar errors, it's my second language and I'm a spur of the moment writer so I'm hoping its all readable.
> 
> Also I drew Cherry if anyone is interested in how I imagined her from that first night with Benny at the 38
> 
> https://helenaamell.tumblr.com/post/174701528617/


	9. The survivor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning for rape mention

Nero’s suite was much like the rest of the Gomorrah, designed to make whoever entered it feel like they were in an important place. Expensive furniture were all around them both, a small table with quite a few chairs surrounding it alluding to that he probably had meetings here too. He was sat in one of those chairs now, looking like a John ready for seconds. He was slick with sweat and looked like a demon to her, dilated pupils alluding to him having something other than just blood in his blood.  
  
She circled the room slowly with her eyes once more, forgetting herself for a small moment, feeling the space to be familiar. Memories of small legs dangling between the railings and chuckles echoing through a large dust filled space, she’d been here before.  
  
_Innocence in a place of sin, protected yet in danger, this room felt like a space filled of contradiction to her and she felt on edge because of it._  
  
Her focus snapped back to the man underneath her, catching him eyeing her in the most predictable of ways.  
  
_They aren’t people those Omerta’s, they are more akin to animals, always expect them to want one thing and one thing only._  
  
She cleared her throat, regaining his attention before she continued speaking to him, no, no, not him – it.  
  
He chuckled, an initially rumbling sound that infuriated her enough to press down, turning it into a strained hiss – he probably didn’t think of her as an actual threat just yet.  
  
“I will answer your questions, got no reason to hide any answers you may want, but I’ve got two conditions.”  
  
Now it was her turn to chuckle, pressing her heel further down, feeling a sickening heat rise from his broad body as she leaned forward to look into those dark brown eyes of his, seeing the pain he held back as if it was put on display.  
  
“You sure you’re in a position to be askin’ for anything? Seems like I’ve got a full house in my grasp and your house is lookin’ like it’s face to face with a wrecking ball.”  
  
He smirked, his eyes closing slightly, showing faint crowsfeet that made her back chill. That face did shit to her that made her stomach turn, it was like having your face right up next to a carcass, you were bound to get queasy.  
  
“Now, now sugar, you’re forgetting I’m packin’ too. For having grown up around here I’m surprised you can’t remember to search your targets.”  
  
He waved his revolver around to show he was telling the truth and Cherry cursed to herself. should’ve thought of as much, but his face made her lose her temper.  
  
She didn’t move, didn’t react to the barrel turning to aim at her chest. She had survived a shot to the head, if that was a lucky coincidence this would make for an untimely end. But somewhere deep down she knew he wouldn’t kill her, but she couldn’t say why, just that she knew he wouldn’t.  
  
“Tell me your conditions and I’ll consider ‘em .” She shone a smile up at him, pressing her tits up so that his revolver was pressed between them. He let out a little gasp that bordered on cute and looked up into her eyes with an unbelieving expression on his face.  
  
_Obvious stares, lustful looks from a boy just starting to grasp the idea of sexuality, probably too early but it was a brothel after all. The focus was on one that could never be reached by him, but she, oh she was the next best thing, their faces were the same and because of that he was set on her. It was only because of that simple fact and there was nothing sweet about it.  It was all only about power, power was what drove the world and decided who got to live as a an actual person._  
  
“You’re crazy, just like she was.” He mouthed, dragging his revolver slightly up and down along her cleavage. She didn’t need to wonder, she already knew that it wasn’t her he was truly looking at and yet it was still just as sickening.  
  
Was, was she dead?  
  
She forcefully pressed that thought away and shifted her focus, that he still hadn’t covered up but he had put his gun away was strange. Why was he making this easy for her?  
  
“You’re not gonna cover yourself for me huh?” She grumbled, annoyed at his comfort  
  
“Nothing you haven’t seen before I suspect, would be like hiding a beast from a farmer.”  
  
“A beast? Don’t flatter yourself.” She chuckled under her breath before creating space between them  
  
She sat down on a chair close to the one he was perched in, the creaking of it the only sound to be heard echoing through this well decorated cell of a room, sipping her own drink more carefully than he had.  
  
“I want the truth.” She said simply, couldn’t show him all of her cards but she hoped he wouldn’t be able to resist the bait laid before him.  
  
He rolled his eyes and leaned back in a way that had her eyes zoning in on his now flaccid cock. She wanted to rip it off of him, silently thanking whatever gods may be at play for making her feel more and more turned off on men by the second.  
  
“Well I have one truth in store just for you babe.” He took her eye contact back, seemingly boring his stare into her before continuing.  
  
“Your mother was a whore, didn’t work here for just anyone though, she was the closest thing to a wife this family’s ever had and she was married to my pa. From the company you’re keeping and how you’re Benny’s supposed _girlfriend_ , I’d say you’re following in her footsteps. But make no mistake, you were born to her and because of that fact you’re no more than another piece of property that’s been misplaced, can’t just become a person when you were born a toy. It’s a good thing you walked in here on your own volition, makes taking back what’s rightfully ours that much easier.”  
  
She laughed, a hearty sound that felt more natural than any other part of their conversation so far before she swiftly dug her knife into his thigh, stifling his scream with her hand as she did.  
  
She had straddled him as she stabbed him, staring down into his once again pain filled eyes as she bored that small knife of hers deeper, feeling his cock growing hard yet again.  
  
Fucking sicko, just like his dad  
  
“You’re up for playing games huh Nero? Well I’ve had enough of games for a lifetime. I don’t need respect from you, but I don’t want your bullshit either. Keep it short, just like that thing you’re so proudly showing off to me you pig.”  
  
She removed her hand as she felt his tongue lapping in between her fingers, grinning at the thought of how she hadn’t washed them off since Benny, yet keeping quiet as she saw him looking with painfully aroused yet angered eyes at her.  
  
“Tell me all you know about me.” She growled, her hand still gripping the small blade lodged in his thigh. How he was still maintaining this façade of being in control was almost impressive, but she was willing to bet money on that he was drugged up on something. A pity considering that would take the edge off of killing him off, but as long as he died soon that was all she cared about.  
  
He picked up the cigar he had retrieved as he had first sat down and offered her the lighter, urging her to light it for him as his hand traced up and down her ass. Getting closer to her pussy by the second, she grew annoyed by her body’s natural reaction to this closeness, to the feel of his cock hardening under her. She despised him, wanted to kill him, but she was also aching somehow.  
  
He took his time after she lit his cigar, taking a couple of drags and blowing out the puffs of smoke into her cleavage.  
  
He felt her up, making her feel dirty and used but somehow aroused nonetheless. A part of her felt like crying, another like murdering him on the spot. But she needed to know about herself, his story of her wouldn’t be the whole truth no matter what, she knew that much, but she knew what he would tell her would have snippets of truth to it. He wasn’t quick enough to make up an entirety of a lifetime about her and her advantage was enough for him to have a hard time lying. She looked like his epitome of a sexual fantasy and his inner Oedipus would get a filthy thrill out of it.  
  
  
He finally spoke and she paid close attention for the first time since getting there to what he said.  
  
“Well, you were born here, Magdalena had surprisingly enough gotten pregnant and we were all told it was my father’s kid. You were a cute one and the apple of his eye for a while, no one questioned it until you were about two or so.”  
  
He took another drag, taking his time as if simply enjoying her closeness. She grew impatient and asked him “until what?”  
  
He smiled, she had apparently taken a bait laid out by him and she felt a disgusted shudder spread through her back.  
  
“Until you started to look like someone entirely different.”  
  
She drew her knife out from his leg, feeling more of his blood gushing down and staining her dress before putting it to his throat, but he kept on smoking as calmly as ever, somehow having regained his sense of control too.  
  
“Who?”  
  
He laughed again, that same taunting laugh that he had back in the 38  
  
“If you don’t remember your life, his name won’t matter either way. You want me to continue or are you gonna pretend you’re willing to kill me? You knew enough to know who to come to, are you certain anyone else here will know what I do?”  
  
She drew back slowly, feeling that disgusting cock of his twitch underneath her, still disgustingly hard.  
  
He didn’t take as long before he continued this time, but he had started to drag her bloodsoaked skirt up bit by bit, it had already been scrunched up to above her knee but he made it go further up and soon he would reach his target.  
  
She wanted to imagine Benny just then, what his tender touch and eyes meant for her, even though she hardly knew the bastard. She felt as if she was being unfaithful in some twisted way, but he was the reason she had to come here to begin with. He was the reason she didn’t know who she was and he didn’t deserve her treating him as something to be considered. He obviously didn’t know her, so she couldn’t get those answers from him anyhow.  
  
“Tell me who I am or I will gut you.” She said as she felt him starting to play with her panties  
  
His eyebrows raised and he took another drag of the cigar.  
  
“Feisty aint ya? Okay fine, will tell ya half of it before and half of it after.”  
  
She suddenly remembered his earlier words, two conditions? That only sounded like one.  
  
“What’s the other condition _boy_?”  
  
The smile he donned made her feel like hurling, he was too smug and she wanted to offer him one of those Chelsea smiles she’d heard of somewhere.  
  
“I will tell you who you are, give you all that you have to get at our establishment, but in exchange you need to sign a contract making sure nothing from you will ever change who’s in charge here.”  
  
That was a strange request, was she owed something out of these bastards?  
  
“Give me the first bits you know and then I’ll give you my answer.”  
  
He chuckled again, pressing his disgusting self closer towards her crotch. She looked away, couldn’t maintain her eyecontact with him anymore. This was too much, maybe if she had her memories this wouldn’t feel as filthy but for now she had the mindset of a woman who’d only ever been with one man and one she felt something for to boot.  
  
“You’re the kid of a man who raped your mother, my father did his best to cover it up, but we all knew, you’re a parasite left by a man who used your mother for her intended purpose, but she wasn’t his to use. She hated you, you were the reason she died like cattle by her husband’s hands.”  
  
The world was at a sudden stand still, her vision returned to his and he was picking her up in her chock, using her state to his advantage and throwing her to the floor.  
  
“You were an unwanted brat, a slight upon our family, the wife of one of our higher ups being used by a man from the outside? She cried and told us all how she didn’t want it, but we knew what she was, a common whore and you’re just the same. A thing meant to be used, not quite human but somehow living under the disguise of one.”  
  
She stared up at him, transfixed by his words, feeling that sense of leaving her own body once more as she continued to listen.  
  
He seemed to delight in her helplessness, this power he had suddenly gained over her in her sense of chock. Drunk on his own sense of power, the one true drug of the wasteland.  
  
He continued, probably enjoying the pained expression on her face, tears burning behind her eyes as her mind spun. Dirty, rough carpet stinging as she was pressed down into it, her bare skin against it stinging her numbing mind.  
  
“You wanna know the funniest thing though? My dad wanted to adopt ya, he was misled by that face of your mother and her shapely figure to the point where he would give her all of his legacy. But you see we couldn’t have any of that, he had his own offspring from earlier and some little brat bred from a whore won’t ever take what’s rightfully ours from us, so we slit his throat after forcing him to off her.”  
  
_Move, for fucks sake move, don’t go down like this you idiot._  
  
“It’s hilarious that you thought to walk in here, being the last living proof of a weak man and his whore wife. Now you have a choice, either you get pregnant by me, making sure our legacy is ensured or you will be killed the way she was, left in an anonymous grave god knows where.” He continued  
  
He pulled her skirt up roughly and moved to remove her underwear when Cherry finally snapped.  
  
With power she didn’t know herself to possess she kneed him in the groin, causing something of a roar to escape him.  
  
Fuck House, fuck Benny, fuck all of this fucking plot.  
  
She flipped around him with inhuman speed, removing the belt from his robe in the process and securing it around his throat as he writhed in pain underneath her.  
  
She didn’t think, she didn’t care anymore, if she would be shot on her way out that didn’t mean shit to her anymore.  
  
She pulled the belt hard, knotting it quicker than what should be humanly possible.  
  
“LIAR, YOU’RE A FUCKING LIAR!”  She screamed, her voice becoming shrill in her anger, it didn’t even sound like her anymore.  
  
He gasped for breath but couldn’t find it any air, flailing wildly around himself and punching at her. She stared maniacally down at him, continuing to do so even after she felt numbing pain hitting her chest from his fists, pressing her heel down into his leg to where she felt a sickening sinking feeling. She wanted to turn her face around, didn’t want to see him anymore but she willed herself, he had just admitted to being behind her mother’s murder. This fucker would see her looking down at him as he died.  
  
She saw his face turning blue and she felt a grin spread over her face, she clenched her teeth together, feeling him slip away before her eyes.  
  
Yes, yes fucking go into the darkness you disgusting piece of trash.  
  
She heard knocking on the door, furious bangs from the outside and a man’s voice.  
  
“Fuck, you better fucking hurry up and die or next time I get my hands on ya it will be worse than this, I can promise you that. I will sever every limb from that worthless body of yours if you don’t fucking hurry up and die.” She panted and stared down at him as his eyes rolled back into his head.  
  
She heard fiddling with the locks – fuck was someone trying to pick it?  
  
Feeling Nero’s muscles relax underneath her she made a snap decision, she left the belt tied around his neck and bolted up the stairs of his suite, hiding underneath the bed to make sure she wasn’t seen.  
  
She made her way on all fours underneath it, feeling that horrendous rough feeling of the filthy carpet digging into her yet again, but this time it made her feel more alive. Like she was in fact here, not raped or killed by that waste of air hopefully lying dead on the floor beneath her.  
  
Shouting could be heard from the lower level, words she didn’t make out due to the fuzziness still within her mind drowned out. She could feel the thudding of footsteps beneath her vibrating through her body, so much effort for saving the life of a cockroach.  
  
The door made a loud sound of a bang and footsteps could be heard around the place when she had an idea.  
  
Shimmying out of her hidingspot she saw suitwearing securityguards running up and down the place. She moved to put her hands in the air and allowed her pent up tears to spring free.  
  
“Help me!” She shouted at them  
  
The both of them looked young enough, naïve enough, either they would believe her bullshit or she could probably take them down.  
  
  
  
She walked the strip once more, the chill of night biting into her skin, making her numb yet again.  
  
The guards had bought her story, she was just a prostitute meant to spend the night with Nero and then some unknown assailant had showed up. She had hid under the bed out of fear and she couldn’t give too much of a description because she was just a fragile woman after all. If there was anything to be gained out of the Omerta’s company policy of misogyny it was that no man working there who weren’t a sex worker would never conceive of the possibility that a mere woman could render the boss unconscious – or dead, hopefully dead.  
  
That was her main trifle however, it seemed like the guards had overheard Nero’s shouting and decided to check in. They assured her between her feigned tears that it was likely he would make it.  
She cursed those guards, if they had waited for just a few more minutes she could’ve walked away feeling better than she did.  
  
She walked into the tops and made a B-line towards the elevator, she needed to wash herself, she felt so dirtied by this entire experience that she wanted to cry. Could he have been right? Did her mother hate her? Was she just the spawn of a rape that hadn’t been aborted? But why did she remember that redheaded woman then, where had she been able to go off to if that were the case? Her memories and his poisoned words didn’t add up and she just wanted to sleep.

The worst part of it all was how she knew that she needed to pick up her role of control again later on. But her mission would have served its purpose whether Nero died now or later. She felt numb, Benny felt trivial and someone she could off at will. But this experience had given her perspective, she remembered the words he had uttered before her world turned black back in Goodsprings. “Nothing personal” she could get over that, what she had experienced with Nero was personal and that had been worse. Benny didn’t matter anymore, he was just a way to get her information, whether he lived or died didn’t seem as important anymore.


	10. Gotta look 'em in the eye

The sun shone aggressively over the naked planes, a small girl carrying a bucket of water much too big for her frame stumbling towards mutated cattle was the one sign of movement to be seen for miles. Worn down shoes not fully being able to keep small feet from scorching, the traders wouldn’t come by for the next two weeks but the Brahmin still needed water and food.   
  
A torn up dress made using different scraps of fabric, sewn clumsily together by inexperienced but loving hands was the girl’s one protection from the elements and it clung to her sweat slick skin uncomfortably. The occasional drops of water coming from out the bucket as she scurried forward brought her small comforts as she felt her head becoming foggy.  
  
A drop of sweat ran down the girl’s brow and she wanted to stop and wipe her face before it reached her eye, but she didn’t want to risk staying out here for a second longer than need be, so she scurried forward.  
  
Makeshift wind chimes made from bottle caps and tied together strings made for musical sounds from the small house where the girl lived laying close by. They played an erratic tune composed by the wind - as if encouraging her forward.  
  
_Momma said there’d be fancy lad’s snack cakes for me if I finished my chores on time, can’t waste any time, just a little longer and I’ll be able to put get back inside._  
  
A grown Brahmin and her calf waited patiently for their small master to make her way over to them, their thick skins handled the heat better than most but water remained a necessity for anyone.   
  
It was beginning to get hard to see anymore, her short brown locks were draping over her eyes to where she could only look at her feet in hopes of making it the last bit.  
  
She made the route on the daily, it shouldn’t be a problem to simply make what remained of the walk from memory.  
  
As the girl made her way to the fence that were closing the cattle in a drop of sweat hit her eye, burning it to the point where she was about to topple over and drop the water.  
  
Two strong arms caught her just as she feared she would get burns all over her body from the hot sand hitting her limbs and face.  
  
The water spilled over the dry ground, becoming soaked up by the earth as if the planes themselves where thirsty, as well as cooling her sore feet and providing her a small relief before she finally got to wipe her brow and looked up.  
  
Amber eyes and blue shaggy strands met her eyes as she looked up - she didn’t like the blue on momma, she much preferred the red, it was her favorite color after all.   
  
“Flower what did I tell you about trying to make the route all in one go?”  
  
The older woman’s voice was low and stern, this wasn’t the first time for a while the girl had been told off about trying for more than she could handle.  
  
“I’m sorry momma, I just wanted to get it over with as soon as possible, my feet burn!”

The woman looked sympathetically down at the girl, this wasn’t the norm for them and they were usually strict about stocking up shoes beforehand since the caravans were few and far between. But this time money had been too tight when the traders had come by.  
  
“I understand its hard flower but you can’t carry that much all at once, you make two trips quickly instead of risking something like this happening.”  
  
The blue haired woman picked up the bucket and squatted in front of the small girl, motioning with her hand for her to climb onto her back.  
  
With an excited squeal the small girl leapt at the woman almost a little too forcefully as the pair nearly toppled over in the process.  
  
“Careful Christina, you’re not small anymore and my back isn’t as strong as it used to be!”  
  
_Christina, yes, that was her name wasn’t it? This had once been her reality, but it wasn’t anymore, this was just a dream.  
  
_ She knew she wouldn’t be allowed this memory for much longer, small hands desperately grabbing after the shaggy strands of hair belonging to the woman she remembered loving dearly. But she only found herself getting handfuls of air as her world became dark once more. _  
  
  
_ She was awoken with a start, the dream, or maybe the memory had struck her like a lightning bolt. Sitting up in the small bed, she realized her breathing was erratic. She saw a blonde lock on her shoulder and let out a strange shriek before remembering it was her own.   
  
She hid her face in her hands, trying to calm herself as one would a frightened animal during a radstorm. If you don’t see the danger your mind can reset, she needed to compose herself.  
  
_Breathe in, hold it in for 10 seconds and then breathe out for 10 seconds before repeating. There is no danger here, no safety either so I can’t afford to take too much time._  


As she slowly came back down from her panic she took a look around the small suite, she was alone and the one sound she heard apart from her own breathing was the wind stroking along the building. It made for an uncomfortable sound that made her long for solid ground.   
  
She scooted over to the bedside, stiff carpet meeting her naked feet and making her cringe. The dirt and muck of 200 years of buildup from god knows what could be felt clear as day. The texture which had no doubt been meant to feel soft once had become like small balls of dirt and fiber, sticking to the bottom of her feet as she walked.  
  
Making the way up from the bed too fast earned her a swift yet horrendous feeling of dizziness before she slowly headed for the minifridge hoping for water but finding it to only contain liquors – typical.  
  
Her green dress from the night before lay crinkled at the floor along with those uncomfortable pieces of underwear she was supposed to wear. A suit would be less restricting and more fitting to how she felt but unless the Omerta’s had let out some type of warrant for her during the night she would still have to wear those lacy strings for a few more days.   
  
She dressed casually, a skirt and a camisole of unknown origin paired with boots from her trecks in the wasteland, it would at least allow a breeze of air to reach her body if nothing else and her feet needed a break from all of those fucking heels. It was hard to tell the time of day in this relic of a building so she couldn’t be sure wearing travelling gear from head to toe was wise however – however tempting it sounded.  
  
Her destination for now was to get to the 38 to update that old fossil on yesterday’s events. She doubted Nero would tattle on her since he too had a persona to uphold, if the leader of a whorehouse would admit to having almost been killed off by _a woman_ that would probably be like putting a target square on his back for others to try their luck to finish the job.  
He might send assassins though, but she couldn’t afford to simply reveal her identity and continue what she had started the day before without the go ahead from house.  
  
There was still the chip to be considered, she wondered if she could just go into Benny’s suite and grab it. It seemed like a stupid idea when she would then need to fight her way out with only a silenced 38. and a swiss knife at her disposal. Hopefully that big old screen from another time would have a plan.   
  
  
  
The asphalt was on the verge of melting along the strip, not a soul could be seen as far as her eyes could trace, maybe the locals simply knew the area well enough not to go outside. Cherry thanked any higher powers once again for making her choose boots rather than heels in the blazing heat, but she also realized that if she wanted to keep from getting burns she needed to be quick on her feet. Her dream came to mind as she felt sweat gathering at the small of her back, jumping along the spots of ground seeming more solid than the rest. The landscape as she remembered it seemed close enough by, the Nevada desert seemed unmistakable to her, but she couldn’t quite place the area from memory. She hadn’t passed it by and thus couldn’t remember the way. She cursed under her breath as the heat started radiating through her soles.   
  
_Momma won’t be here to pick me off the ground this time, better get to moving.  
  
  
  
_ Benny’s throat felt horrible, sticky like the casino floors below from a night of drinking, chain-smoking and asking the occasional fruitless question to a TV on wheels. It had left him testy to say the least.   
  
His question seemed simple enough at first glance - is there a way of getting down there underneath that fort without cooperating with those bloodthirsty fuckers wearing skirts. The answer so far seemed to be no, not unless he got really good at sneaking and really fast. His only experience with that was the odd time he as a younger man had found himself in the bedroll of a broad who’d neglected to tell him of her marital status.  But alas, he wasn’t much for stealth, it had always struck him as the coward’s way out – you gotta look ‘em in the eye.  
  
_Eyes, that’s right, her eyes were so freaky yet strangely alluring. They had such a weird color too, but atleast they looked real pretty when she was on her knees looking up – wait no, fuck, back to business._  
  
It didn’t make any sorta sense to him why a goddamned hooker was sneaking back into his mind so frequently. He hadn’t known her that long, had never been one for romance and she had hardly made an impression that had made this strange obsession with her make sense. Sure she had hurt his pride, being all lovey-dovey with him only to then do something as distasteful as bring up the business end of things when he had for once forgotten about it.  
  
He let out an annoyed sigh, dragging his hand along his jaw, feeling that he needed to shave sooner rather than later. Was easier back when they were nomadic in that sense, a beard was more acceptable out there, but then House had always been hell bent on keeping up this ancient charade of his. It was just another thing he would be able to take off of his mind as soon as he figured out where to go from here, if he wouldn’t have solidified in this old stool by then.  
  
As he slammed his fist into the bar in sheer frustration the overfilled ashtray tipped over, making for a disgusting soup-like mixture of ashes together with the spilled liquor from earlier – does anyone ever clean this mess of a place?   
  
Yes Man was stood behind him, buzzing or whatever it was he did when not being interacted with. He had been brought out into the main suite so Benny could drink while sitting down, while also being prepared if a stroke of genius caught a hold of him – it was a long shot but weirder things happened every day out here.   
  
He released a bitter chuckle, seeing that fucking smile in the corner of his eye like the cherry of a shitsprinkled cocktail – and there he went on thinking about _her_ again.   
  
The clinkering of glass and the hiss Benny had let out as a piece of glass he had been unaware of dug itself into his hand made the robot turn over.  
  
“I doubt you’ll make much progress simply inflicting self-harm like that! Let’s think of a more productive way of going forward, why don’t we! Ah, maybe a nap would be right about now for one of you fleshy non-mechanical folks!”   
  
Yes Man’s ever cheery tone was a stark contrast in the otherwise dark and gloomy atmosphere.  
  
“Am I actually getting health advice from a chunk of metal? Ever heard the expression that Vegas never sleeps ‘ol boy? Well I _am_ Vegas.”   
  
Benny retorted as he walked around the bar disk to fetch some vodka, he ought to sanitize the shit after pulling it out after all.  
  
“I do think that title still belongs to Mr. House I’m afraid!” The robotic voice rang through the room  
  
There was no sure way for Benny could know for sure if the bastard pushing his luck was well programmed enough to catch the meaning of a stink eye, but that didn’t stop him from glaring like a child at the reminder of yet another reason why he was drinking.  
  
“Ah! But not for long of course! Just until you figure out how to get close to Caesar without being killed, go Benny!”  
  
Seemed the robot did understand more than he would’ve guessed, still, he ought to ask Swank later where he had found that gal to begin with. He was supposed to have been the one to scope her out after all.  
  
Eyes, why did he come back to thinking about those seemingly again and again. He was more of an assman anyhow. __  
  
“I really do think you need to go lay down there Benny! You look pale, almost like if you’d seen a ghost! Drinking for so long without any sleep seems to do that to you organisms!”  
  
The robots words were followed by the loud crashing of a bottle slipping out of the hand of a man who suddenly saw things clearly.  
  
A ghost? Oh that seemed like the magic word, he suddenly knew for sure that he had seen those eyes before and suddenly he knew where.


	11. Breathe in, breathe out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The follow up of this chapter will be released soon, but I wanted to post this one since I do so appreciate the people enjoying my story. 
> 
> When you comment on my work it makes me super happy and it in turn makes me update faster so if you enjoy my story Im just putting that out there.
> 
> Either way I hope you enjoy where I take things from here, this chapter is more of an inbetween one before shit hits the fan.

 “You did what now?”   
  
The screen showing the picture supposedly portraying House seemed to glitch more than usual as she told him the news, House’s tone was seemingly always very composed but it seemed like this little error she’d caused made his façade break just a tad.  
  
“As I told you, he apparently knew me and I tried wiping him out as a result. Unluckily enough there were guards who must’ve heard the commotion and now here I am.”   
  
Cherry sneered, she felt like she was a little girl being scolded all over again. It might’ve been a bit of a glorified version of what had actually happened back at the Gomorrah, but what House didn’t know couldn’t harm him. Even if she did tell him the actual reason she attacked what she was telling him as a cover wasn’t all that far from the truth, she would have to kill him if he stood in the way.  
  
“Foolish girl, as soon as you knew that he recognized you, you should’ve come to me. The messier way rarely works in my town, this is supposed to be a partnership after all.”  
  
His tone was scolding and she felt herself shrink back a little bit. Her breath hitching strangely, what was it with her and authority?  
  
“Well I couldn’t very well jump to conclusions now could I? That first time he went after me with these things that could have very well have been lies; it’s still a possibility that they are. If he could’ve been bribed or quieted down that would probably cause less trouble for you wouldn’t you think? So I thought I should’ve given it a go to resolve things peacefully but he wasn’t up for that, and if what he said is indeed a lie, then it is a vicious enough one and one that he seemed eager enough to spread that he could potentially blow all my hard work. I am not a close range fighter but had I left after finding out about the things he said he would’ve been too aware. He would know someone was coming for him and I couldn’t risk that.”  
  
She had become heated after relaying her reasonings, panic creeping the way up her spine as if she was put on trial and disbelieved.   
  
House sighed, his face remained the same old still picture but she had talked with him enough times to know that small tip offs about how he felt was all she could hope for.  
  
“You never did share his supposed information on you, but I suppose I’m not in a position to question your reasons if we’re supposedly partners in this. What I will ask of you is that next time I wish to be informed before you investigate a lead, if not just because I would enjoy not being left in the dark then because I could provide assistance if things go south again.”  
  
Her breathing steadied again, he was seemingly taking her word for what she said or at the very least fully willing to protect her if need be. Where to go from here would be another issue all together though.  
  
“From what little information that was overheard by my securitron’s here at the 38 Nero seemed to believe you are a bit of goods that had gone astray. But since the families have only been where they are for about 7 years there isn’t much of a possibility you were raised at the Gomorrah. If these claims have credit you must’ve been born a tribal and thus I am afraid there is little I can do to support Nero’s claims.” House declared  
  
There was some comfort to be had in that, she could still consider herself an unknown and that was atleast one thing off her mind.  
  
“But sadly we have no way of making sure he isn’t in fact going to try and relay that information to the chairmen and because of that I have scheduled a talk with him as soon as he recovers. Luckily enough he remains unaware of our partnership so if you would be so kind as to finish the job I would consider this a small misstep in our partnership.” He continued  
  
The smile creeping up her face could only be described as malicious, and the realization that she would get another chance at finishing what she’d started felt like a rush of adrenaline surging through her system.  
  
“What will we do if he wakes up and shares what he knows?”   
  
She answered, her tone almost chipper now, bloodthirst making her shiver delightfully all throughout her body.  
  
“Ah, I have made sure the Omerta’s have been instructed to continue as before, I know Nero to still be unconscious so we’re most likely clear for the weekend. To be on the safe side I would instruct you to stay at the 38 during the nights from here on out, but…”   
  
He trailed off, she knew that if she could see his face now he would likely be looking away from her. It had seemed too good to be true that she would just be handed Nero as some kind of fleshy gift.   
  
“That wouldn’t work since my aim is to get close to Benny I take it? Nero will be my payment for continuing while having a chance of being found out?”

She sighed, this talk seemed like a rollercoaster of ups and downs but she didn’t come to Vegas just to sit pretty after all.  
  
“Good girl.” Echoed his response  
  
  
  
Making her way back she trailed along the parts of the strip where slithers of shadow managed to get to.   
There was the issue of Benny to consider still, she needed to figure out a way back into his good graces before nighttime and that was a task easier said than done. Spinning a lie would be easy enough, problem with that was it still made her progress halt back and there wasn’t time to be uncertain. From here on out she would need to keep her eyes on the prize, no more wavering could be allowed if she wanted to survive.  
  
  
She had dressed herself for another meeting, a black sleek dress this time that covered most of her body. It had a halterneck and the usual a slit for her leg to look elongated at the side. She wanted to look more conservative at this time, but she still wanted to make an effort befitting of a girl living on the strip.  
  
Her makeup was darker around the eyes than she had ever worn it before on the strip, she had had too much time to prepare and thus it had gone from natural, to less natural to where she felt she could wear spikes and go out as a passable raider. There was too much time to think and she wasn’t allowed enough vodka to relax her lest she wanted to hurl mid meeting.   
  
Mr New Vegas had been her sole company since she returned; his smooth voice making her feel less lonely in this world where any form of connection was dangerous by default.  
  
Benny had seemingly stayed out of her way the entire day, not checking up on her or using his lewd techniques to supposedly encourage her good behavior.   
  
Something within her had shut off, like a defense mechanism activated by her almost killing a man with her bare hands. She couldn’t know if it had been her first go at such a thing but considering she’d survived into adulthood in this wasteland she would have to guess the answer was no.  
  
She groaned in discomfort as she put another pair of slingbacks on, as if it wasn’t bad enough that she for now had absolutely no clue how to act around anyone she also had to be dressed uncomfortably.   
  
Something about tonight made her shudder as she went to twist the doorknob, like her instincts were telling her something was amiss. She had stacked her swiss knife and silenced 20. per usual but something within her felt like she was in danger and she made a silent prayer that the fact that she would be in House’s building would protect her.  
  
  
Making her way down to the lobby she saw Benny and Swank standing there, waiting for her she supposed so she waved in their direction.   
  
Benny met her eyes but looked strange, like he was somehow pained or deep in thought. Had she hurt him that bad? Was he still thinking about what she’d said the night before?  
  
She felt as if something clamped down in her chest, making her feel like she was sinking. Why, she had felt numb just minutes before and now suddenly everything came flooding back again. She wasn’t even allowed the luxury of having a change in facial expressions, all she could do was walk over to him.  
  
He didn’t say anything to acknowledge her being there, him and Swank just walked out together in unison and she followed. It was confusing all of it, it made her shudder in terror, had the Omerta’s ratted her out? She had never been under the impression that the families had much in terms of loyalty to one another but it wasn’t impossible.   
  
Her breathing became labored, she shouldn’t have gone to the Gomorrah but that wasn’t why she was feeling terror.  
  
What is he thinking of me? Why is he being so cold?  
  
From an outside perspective all that could be seen were three people walking slowly together, the smell of rain in the air alluding to a change in weather coming along.   
  
Cherry felt like her previous dealings might’ve made her paranoid, but in this world it was better to be cautious. As the doors to the 38 opened she felt like she released a breath stronger than any in recent memory, here she was safe and she longed for that feeling to last.


	12. No answers, more questions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for how late I’ve been to update and the re-upload. College has been riding my ass and I didn’t feel truly good about the chapter before. I promise not to delete this one folks.

Cold sweat ran down her back, for this evening’s event the families were the only ones invited, no henchmen but simply the kooks in charge. A long table had been set out with chairs surrounding it in front of that large screen showing the stoic image of House, the same screen she’d been scolded by earlier that day. Securitrons surrounded them at most sides as if to let the families know not to try anything stupid – it was as if they were all there to have a lovely family dinner, except with murderous robots there to make sure no one put their elbows on the table.

It was boring on top of everything else, she hadn’t anything she could add to these talks anyhow and now there were no eligible people around with whom she could play with to pass the time.

 

The evening had continued on pretty uneventfully, although sadly enough the soothing buzz of champagne didn’t seem to have its usual effect on her nerves. The ashtray closest to her filled up quickly as she tried with no avail to ease her tensions the one way she knew how – by numbing them down until they didn’t sting as much. But those fuckers were sea ready by now, swimming happy as could be around in her noggin’ making her all the more tense by the minute.

 

Two of the Omerta’s had showed up for the talks and they seemed none the wiser regarding who she was, or what she had done. But somehow she still felt as if the air had turned thicker and that every breath was laboring.

 

Benny hadn’t spoken a word to her during the entirety of the night, she haad never figured him to be so sensitive but then again she didn’t really know him that well to begin with.

It was most likely the simple fact that he was denying her the attention she had been given so freely before, cutting out her rations just as she’d just gotten a good taste of what he had on offer.

 

She was now however getting more drunk by the second, her boredom making her drinking turn reckless to speed up those calming walls of drunken comfort she so desperately relied on. As a result she realized there was an opportunity to be had in how serious they all were and how they were all essentially on her home turf.

Benny was sat next to her, even though he was technically avoiding her without making it obvious, he still couldn’t sit anywhere else, she was there to make a show of his good faith after all.

 

The radio was turned down low in the background of the talks, working as a slight white noise to distract from the fact that the 38 was the least friendly setting - if such a thin was ever possible, on all of the strip.

 

Champagne remained her one sole companion as she was feeling herself turn mischevious, she unapologetically eyed Benny up and down, her heavy drinking making her anxiety swim silently and she thought to herself how his skin wasn’t as tanned as it had been when he shot her, and now he was now clean shaven to boot. He looked almost dapper, like a pretty-boy who she desperately wanted to get her hands on.

Snaking her finger lazily up and down the collar of his blazer she was no longer bothering to search for his reaction, but instead she was just taking in all that she was feeling – it served as a lovely distraction from the anxiety she had felt just a few hours prior.

 

He smelled nice, a masculine sort of scent that made her feel like jumping him like a wild animal in heat. She might’ve been sex repulsed just a few hours prior but now she felt that fire hitting her like a deathclaw right in her stomach. It was probably also because she saw Cachino eyeing her from the corner of her eye.

 

She might’ve let the emotional part of things go, but that didn’t mean she’d made a conscious effort to stop lusting after him.

 

Filthy stares of the other people around the table made her feel like she was performing to an audience, reminding her of something she didn’t wish to think of but turning into a sick sort of arousal in the pit of her stomach. Was this her minds attempt at self-defense, or was she just wicked to the core?

 

Finally she decided to look up at him and she was met by those dark brown eyes of his, Benny was looking right at her, the look on his face strangely solemn but his eyes betrayed that fire she’d seen the previous night. He was still weak for her it seemed and god that was good to know.

 

She allowed her hand to ghost over Benny’s cock, feeling a slight twitch underneath the fabric of his pants. His concentration seemingly shifted slightly as he grinned while still actively participating in his newly apparent staring contest with Cachino – one Cherry hadn’t noticed until now that he was participating in.

 

Cherry looked over toward Cachino as she resumed her treasurehunt, stroking over Bennys hardening cock as she looked straight at the other man.

 

Feeling herself spurred on by having Cachino’s eyes to set on them, she once more enjoyed the feeling of being watched. She wanted to taste Benny and her intoxication made her bold so she disappeared underneath the table.

She heard Cachino try to rat them out as he asked Mr. House

 

“Don’t you think a participant has disappeared.”

 

But Cherry knew better, Mr. House was the one to send her out on this mission after all.

 

“The Omerta’s should know these talks well enough not to try to shift my focus, Mr. Cachino I suggest you keep your thoughts to yourself if they don’t concern the wellbeing of the strip.”

 

Giggling at House’s support, feeling the now hot tingles of champagne run through her, she settled herself between Benny’s legs and felt his body twitch violently as she breathed hot air into his crotch, grinning happily as she saw him shudder in response.

 

Enjoying fully her newfound power over him she continued with her work, stroking along his shaft on the outside of his checkered pants. Feeling him becoming hard underneath her hand, god he was big.

 

Fumbling with his belt as discreetly as she could she was delighted to see he wasn’t stopping her. As she released his bulging cock from his pants she let out a small gasp. God it was beautiful, it was big and had an angry shade of red at the stimulation, they might've fucked before but she hadn't ever taken the time to truly look at it.

 

The was seemingly no time to waste as she devoured it, tasting the saltiness and manliness of him. He wasn’t prepared and apparently hadn’t cleaned it to a point where it glistened, but it wasn’t dirty, it tasted divine.

 

Licking up and down along his length she was groping at his balls as she worked. She sucked him in unison with her stroking, working his shaft with her hand.

She wanted his cum in her mouth, wanted to taste it, no, she wanted to taste him.

 

The fact that anyone could just look underneath the table and see what she was doing only served to spur her on.

Continuing her brisk pace she could hear Cachino once again switch his attention to Benny, interrupting another one of House's long sermon's.

 

“So Benny, you’ve been awfully quiet, how is business at the tops? I heard you had a nasty bit of publicity due to some courier getting shot in the head.”

 

He asked, surprising Benny as he struggled to stay composed, Cherry’s tongue working the underside of the head of his cock.

 

Holding herself back from biting his dick off as she remembered her objective she instead focused herself onto working on his shaft, wanting to embarrass him instead, it would serve as a longer term punishment. She still had the bigger picture to think about after all.

 

“Aaah… AH! Yeah, that was unfortunate but you KNooOW how it is, less teETH and more lovin is the only way to handle it you know.”

 

Cachino seemed perturbed by his strange choice of words and his fluctuating tone but the watchful eye of House kept his eyes on the prize.

 

House continued his talking as if nothing had happened, ignoring Cachinos question alltogether, acting as her ally even though she knew him to be slightly more conservative at heart.

 

“Aight.”

 

Was all Cachino muttered, seemingly recognizing his own defeat.

 

Cherry sank Benny down into her throat, she wanted to embarrass him more and more for every second, even though she knew House was trying to shift the focus from them. It served as the one thing she could do to regain her control, her lost power and she needed to regain it.

 

There was a strange pleasure that she felt filling her body at the lewd act she was performing, shamelessly whoring herself out to the man that might've cause her death, but somehow it had her feeling as if her senses were all on fire. Her body shivered at the thought of pleasing him, he had a way of taking over her senses fully.

 

Suddenly she felt his fingers in her hair, pushing her mouth further down on him as she felt the first hot spurts of cum fill her mouth. She let out a low hum as she swallowed it all, still sucking on him after he was drained just to overstimulate him further.

 

Power, that was what she wanted back, it was seemingly all she cared about when she dealt with him. But as he finished she felt a defeated sort of emotion running through her.

 

There was no answers, only more questions to be had.


	13. When enough is enough

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Happy Halloween!

He had been flustered, his usually calm demeanor somehow shaken while he dragged her back to the tops by the top of her arm. A steady grip that was somehow still warm while being threatening, he wasn’t hurting her and yet it was a grip telling her she’d do best not to try and shake it off.  
  
She didn’t fight him, and that felt somehow sickly intimate on its own, she knew something was happening and that considering the situation it should be making alarm bells go off in her head – but somehow they weren’t. Perhaps the bullet had erased all of her common sense along with her memories; at this point did it matter? There was something compelling about him, a strange kind of attraction binding her to him and a role he kept up that drew her in and made her want to see whatever this was through.  
  
Her heels were the one ironic sound keeping her grounded, those shoes she hated so much click clacking along the broken concrete of the strip. If she would die there in the ruins of a filthy sky scaper it wouldn’t be the first death seen by the broken floors that awaited her. She felt a sense of defeat run through her spine as the lobby opened up in front of her.  
  
The warmth of his body was ironically enough steadying as he turned to Swank with an excuse, they needed to talk things over all _three_ of them. There was an icky feeling that coursed inside of her as he spoke his words, it was _his_ territory now, _his_ place of comfort.  
  
She didn’t know if Swank was in on it – he must have been? There was that sense of fellowship typical of the khans, why she felt as much as she did remained a mystery.  
__  
Two men she knew weren’t likely on her side behind her back as she was shuffled face first into the same suite she had first fucked the man that had put a bullet in her skull.  
  
The silence felt deafening; Mr. New Vegas still rang in the background just as he had as she had left, the filthy carpet numbing the sound of her heels up until she stopped in her tracks, strong arms still clutching her tight.  
  
Her own small knife gnawed at the edge of her torn stocking where she’d hid it, cutting into her flesh ever so slightly as she stood uncomfortable with her eyes firmly placed on that couch she had eyed that first night. Beige, she hated that color, it didn’t hold anything for her to cling to. Like her own skin when she kept to the dark long enough.  
  
Finally he spoke, but his voice sounded like a murmur, she could no longer make out the words. She knew this feeling, knew her body’s response. It was somehow protective of her own vessel, but for now it couldn’t keep her alive so she struggled to keep her senses and made out the last words he spoke, not aware of just how much they would be etched in her mind.  
  
“I know who she is.”  
  
Goosebumps clad her skin at the words, had he seen _or maybe felt_ the scar on her head? Why now of all times, fate must’ve played a cruel trick on her, to her it couldn’t be anything but funny at the time. She didn’t know why, but she laughed at the words.  
  
She focused her eye on a particular spot on the couch, spacing out with her back still turned to him. His chest pressed up against her back as he seemingly spoke to Swank. The rumble of his voice disgustingly enough still eliciting shivers down her back and she pressed her ass against his crotch in a primal response.  
  
It didn’t have its usual effect, it seemed like an in learned survival tactic, but one she couldn’t place. He pulled her back violently her head bent uncomfortably backwards to where she was looking up at his face from below him.  
  
His usually warm dark brown eyes somehow felt cold, more reminiscent of her own than she could remember. She didn’t like this development, why was he suddenly immune to his more basic instincts? She’d never actually thought of him as a person with much integrity before.  
  
The low rumble of his voice acted as something to send fear throughout her system rather than her usually lewd responses.  
  
“Swank, did you hire this girl?”  
  
Her body turned stiff, a chill spreading throughout her abdomen as she felt her pulse quicken.  
  
She couldn’t see Swanks expression, only the stern expression on Benny’s face – devoid of any emotion as his pull on her arm seemingly became tighter. She knew she would bruise from it, assuming she’d live to see them was another issue entirely.  
  
“Nah, the girl I had scouted out was a redhead, a slim thing with a sharp tongue. I had just figured you found this one on your own.”  
  
Swanks voice sounded uncertain, _so Benny hadn’t fully let him in on whatever thoughts swirled through his head._

His expression remained unchanged – these news were apparently not surprising to him.  
  
The feeling that struck her took her back to that night in Goodsprings, cool sand making its way into her boots as she was sat on her knees facing the barrel of an intricately carved gun.  
  
All she could think to do was to only focus on his gaze and the pain shooting through her arm, he was making some type of statement to her and it left her feeling dumbstruck. Her instinct on handling him was always sexual, but now that option was seemingly off the table.  
  
There was a brief exchange of words happening between the two men, words she might’ve registered had she not felt fear numb any senses not focusing on _him._ Then simply the sound of a door opening and closing, letting her know that for now it was just the two of them in the room once more.  
  
It was so stupid all of this, she had trusted House and this was where it got her. You couldn’t trust men, they were more akin to animals rather than actual human beings, someone had told her as much time and time again but yet here she was - _stupid, stupid, girl._  
  
“Did those fuckers send you?”  
  
He finally growled, breaking her shocked mind’s reverie with his eyes still boring into her skull like his bullets once had.

Genuine confusion was the only way she could think to describe what she felt in that moment.

“Did who send me?” She stuttered, caught off guard by the question.

“Don’t play dumb with me pussycat, you waltz in here however many years later and pretend you don’t know me? Even changed your hair to top it all off, I have no idea how the fuck I didn’t notice before.”

His face confused her; he looked strangely hurt but she had no clue as to why, none of this had ever been personal so why would this hotshot Vegas man ever look so _hurt,_ it didn’t make any sort of sense and it was enough to make her feel completely at a loss.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” She finally shuddered, and then she saw the first change in him which she could understand – anger.

He dragged her back up to where she was standing, flipping her around and letting her go briefly before crashing her against the wall who’d been previously behind them next to the door, his arm now embracing her while still being just as forceful as before.  
  
His other hand went up to her neck again, pressing his thumb down against her windpipe and making her struggle for her breath.

“Don’t play dumb with me Christy, it took me a while, but I figured out it was you. It can’t be anyone but you, those slitherkins know you too and you’ve got those fucking eyes everyone went on and on about so fucking hard. Seriously, the jigs up doll, tell me what the fuck you want.”

Silence, deafening silence was all that left in the wake of his words. Was he mistaking her for someone else? Had he thought he had cracked some sort of code and now she was supposed to drop some sort of mask and come clean?

But then again the name she had remembered in her dream – Christina, Christy for sure was a possible variant of it.

She didn’t have much time to think it over, he was seemingly impatient for her response as his thumb pressed down harder, causing her to gasp for air. Telling him about her amnesia wouldn’t do her any good, for now he was seemingly still ignorant about how she was the courier. Playing a role had gone okay enough so far, she might as well continue with it before she’d end up choked up and dying on that same filthy floor she’d become so hyperaware of lately.

“I’m… Sorry.” She choked out, thinking it was a good a place as any to start.

 

“You’re sorry? Really doll? That’s the best you can do? You fuck around with me during an entire weekend; have me going around showing you off to House all the while your psycho brothers are littered over the place. What was the point? Were you just trying to make a fool out of me huh?”

His tone had turned threatening, the words he aimed at her came out like a hiss, reminding her of his tribal origins.

But still there was nothing, only faint pictures of that woman she knew to be her mother, the tattoo on her wrist and her name. 

“I haven’t met them in so long; I didn’t think they would recognize me.” She attempted, knowing full well that only added more questions for him to ask.

His eyebrow arched in disbelief and he loosened the pressure on her neck. It was like she’d just told him about sending off ghouls into space.

“Why are you here.” He finally sighed  
  
the silence that ensued between them felt like a strong pressure against her ears, she could almost hear the faint sound of her rapid heartbeat. If this was her end her brain seemed intent to simply numb it out. She didn’t know what to do, much less what to say, so her response came naturally.

“You stole something from me.”  
  
She admitted, a small truth but a truth nonetheless escaping her lips even though it by no means meant she had gained any type of trust out of this person.

He scoffed; he thought he’d figured out some great truth no doubt when in fact the bigger truth was still concealed. He let her go and backed away from her, looking somehow older _and smaller._  
  
Hate - that was the only word that came to mind when she actually thought about their exchange of words.

The opportunity was enough for her to act, she liked him but he wasn’t worth dying for and she didn’t want to give him another chance to get close to her.  
  
She drew her knife quickly, it had been sharpened to the point where her fast movement left a trickle of blood from her thigh at the sheer desperation of her act.  
  
Knowing he wasn’t anybody special to her guided her hand, another man seeking to demolish her, another man wanting to destroy her essence and he needed to be gotten rid of. Those were the thought circulating in her head as her breath sped up and her tachycardia worsened.  
  
He looked _solemn_ at this move of hers, defeated almost and that recognition of emotions had her stunted - why did he hesitate?  
  
“What the fuck is this? You threaten me and take me up here by force telling me you know all that I am about but now you’re defeated?”  
  
She screeched her words, emotions she didn’t understand slipping through her every word and causing her to sound shrill, _desperate._  
  
“You’re gonna kill me?” He chuckled, disbelief clear in his voice.  
  
This exchange of words had her feeling the strange prickling of tears beginning in her eyes. Why did he speak as if he knew her as anything other than the courier who hes buried in a shallow grave.  
  
“It would only be an eye for an eye in the scheme of things, wouldn’t you say so.” She mustered, her voice somehow shivering and allowing her mind true emotions to come through.  
  
He looked unfazed, like her words meant nothing to him and he didn’t offer any response. Did he feel that justified? That certain she wasn’t going to reciprocate, what the fuck did he take her for?  
  
But more than that his response made her angry, she didn’t know how much time had passed but she knew the bitter searing hatred she felt towards him. Was he that cold that what he had done meant nothing to him?  
  
A loud bang cut through the thick air, clearing out any misunderstands regarding where the two people stood.


	14. Bang bang, he shot me down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oops I hadn't edited this before posting, sorry, all fixed now.

She was working on autopilot, the courier business and the throbbing ache in her head had to be left as secondary concerns. Right now she had the possibility of finding out who she was or she could just hope that the broken bottle on the wall leaking out its sickly reddish liquid wouldn’t arouse enough suspicion for someone to enter the suite. Since her .22 was silenced the likelihood of any of his fellow chairmen storming through that door was close to nill. She’d learned something from her meeting with Nero after all.  
  
Cold sweat was however running down her back and Benny wore a look of disbelief mixed in with that same old fading mask of nonchalance she’d come to expect from him.  
  
“Jigs up Benny, I am tired of playing these fucking games.”  
  
Her voice croaked, in tune with the sounds of her reloading her gun on shaky fingers. She felt her knees wanting to buckle beneath her but she managed to stand straight using sheer willpower alone.  
  
“Thought that was supposed to be my line.” He panted, pulling himself up from his knelt down position, or atleast he tried to before a well-placed heel came to rest atop his thigh, digging into the taut muscle and making him groan and shudder, a sound somehow still erotic to her despite the stressful situation at hand.  
  
“Tell me all that you know about me, or I won’t hesitate to make your brains resemble that bottle over there believe you me.”  
  
She grunted, anger seeping through her every pore, she hadn’t had any intention of truly making this revenge of hers quite so _personal_ but here he was using familiar sounding nicknames like he knew her.  
  
Playing along had only served the others in the long run, she was tired of acting like she knew things that had been stolen from her. This was as good an ending as any, switching the positions with the vermin that had caused her to lose all and any memories before then. She wanted answers or his head on a pike, either one would do, she just needed this charade to end.  
  
She must’ve been thinking about the situation longer than what was wise, or atleast so it would’ve seemed as his skin met hers once more, causing the small weapon in her hand to fall to the floor.  
  
He slammed her against the wall, breath hot on hers as the pain of the impact hit her spine, and he had grabbed her wrists so that the gun had fallen to the floor. But he made no move to grab it.

What was it in him so sure she would never hurt him. What part of him remained assured as he had stared down her gun.

”Christy, you won’t kill me.” He uttered, voice shakier than normal but still somehow _confident_.

Finding herself wavering she asked herself, wouldn’t she? _Why did he sound so sure?_

”Why wouldn’t I?” She panted voicing her thoughts to the man in front of her. A light sheen of sweat now clad his forehead.  
  
”Look, I don’t know what’s brought you back to Vegas or whatever plans those slitherkin’s got you workin’ on but I know you enough to figure it ain’t work you’re doing willingly. What are their terms? Last I checked you’re valuable enough by yourself, why I oughta be involved remains a mystery.”

A nagging voice at the back of her head recognized the slight jumping of his arm, a nervous habit she knew was his body’s involuntary way of telling her his true state of mind.

“Are they onto me?”  
  
He whispered to her, head nestled close enough to hers where she felt his breath ghosting across her collarbones. Goosebumps clad her skin, as if fuelled by the electricity between them, her fingers gripping desperately after a gun no longer in her possession, his voice just as alluring as before she’d fucked him, he somehow no longer felt like a stranger to her _and that scared the shit out of her._  
  
The smooth surface of his skin stroking against hers made her jumpy, like he held some type of unknown magic over her.  
  
There was another moment of quick thought running through her mind, sped up by the large steady thumb now pressed against the vein on her left wrist; he could now feel her pulse clearly, beating quickly inside her.  
  
Why had she faltered? If she knew him why did it make a difference, she’d apparently known Nero but that didn’t make her hesitate to strangle him with his own robe. But Benny made her hesitate, made her feel like she wasn’t somehow _done_ with him quite yet.  
  
“Tell me.” She shuddered, a small last gasp alluding to her desperate state and her wish to simply give up on the whole situation. Being strong – or feigning strength, who knew which of the two was true anymore, either way she needed to find out who she were lest she’d just remain surrounded by coyotes claiming knowledge.  
  
It was a strange thing, she’d made it this far without an identity but now she felt herself _needing_ one, as well as _needing him_. The strands of blue hair and the warmth of home had unknowingly become her reason to keep going as soon as she recognized them. What would it matter if she lived unless she knew the name to the face, her mother had supposedly been killed so who were this mystery woman whom she called mother? There were tales of vagabonds who lived for themselves alone but this never ending sinking in her stomach made her sure she wasn’t one of them.  
  
As if by instinct her knee flew up to where it hit his groin _hard._  
  
Using her gained momentum to her advantage she caught seight of the same gun that had started all of this glimmering on the inside of his jacketpocket. She wasted no time as she snagged it and pointed it straight to him.  
  
His confident dark eyes bored into hers as he looked up, once again kneeling before her, seemingly stunned by the pain shooting through his family jewels, but doing his best to remain his air of control.  
  
The repulsiveness of having him staring into the barrel of his own gun was not lost on her, the roles switched from their first encounter. It didn’t make any sense, he had done the same to her while keeping a cool demeanor she knew to be impersonal. But why did his face being so close to his own gun make her stomach turn, why did it make her heart flutter.  
  
She felt distanced, like her mind kept things from her out of the sheer reason that it might be protecting her, but still there was something about his face that remained _personal, too close to home for comfort._  
  
Sweat clad his brow, the subtle drip drop of it being her only clue to whether he was sentient.  
  
An urgent urge to bang her own head against the barrel to reclaim her common sense bloomed up into her chest, her nails dug into her own skin as her fingers closed around the barrel.  
  
She saw his lips moving, heard the soft murmur of his voice being blurred out from her mind as she felt it turning fluttery. Like a soft tickling touching the front of her forehead and making her lose all control of her own conscious self.  
   
His lips still moved, blurred out sounds filling the room, no doubt he was pleading with her but all she felt was a sudden eerie calm as she lowered the gun and brought it closer to him, _she wanted to shut him up._  
  
Pressing the gun forward to where it met his mouth she felt delighted in earning his silence, licking her lips as she urged his own open, seeing the soft moisture of his mouth meeting the barrel.  
  
There was something about the act that once again appealed to her filthy side, something about a part of her resigning to the thought that when she left his suite she might be gunned down where she stood. It was a strange sort of choice, he might be out to kill her and she would die either way, but as this top cat of the tops was stood kneeling in front of her she figured she might as well have a little fun with him before meeting either of their ends.  
  
He groaned as she saw him snaking his tongue along the barrel, seemingly catching on to her thought process. No longer mumbling nonsense of knowing her but simply eager for the chance of survival, like a roach making its living amongst floorboards of a house.  
  
She chuckled, feeling a strange sort of power surging through her system.  
  
Might as well have a little fun before she died.


	15. What am I to you?

It was as if gravity had given in, the electricity coursing through her veins acted without her minds consent.   
  
Straddling his lap, gun still in hand, she ground herself against his pelvis – hard.   
  
There was something about having the upper hand – Maria now in her hand, the end of the barrel kissing his temple as Cherry panted softly, her cunt tightening at the sight of his incredibly sexy, dark, heavy lidded eyes looking up at her.   
  
He let out a groan at the friction between them, his breath fast and shallow. She’d never though of him as a masochist but his primal reactions to her movements weren’t an unwelcome surprise nonetheless.

She felt him harden underneath her, that stiff, thick length of his rising up to kiss her opening despite the multitude of layers of clothes keeping them apart.  
  
They both longed for information, she knew she could simply fake knowing what he wanted to know. But her days of sheer confusion made her conscience rear its head.  
  
“An answer for an answer _Ben-man,_ you’re not in a position to argue but I am being generous here as you’ve treated me _real_ good these past couple of days.”   
  
She purred, licking her lips slowly and delighting in how his eyes followed the movement.  
  
A predatory smile clad his lips in response, as if the gun against his skull was simply part of some twisted kind of foreplay.   
  
She felt a hot sting of pain shooting through her back as he smacked her ass with a ferocity she couldn’t have prepared for even if she had tried.  
  
Her body’s response felt shameful, a violent shiver reaching down into her lower belly, it was as if her mind was trying desperately to stay focused but her pussy remained ever focused on using him for all he was worth.   
  
“Awfully cocky for a man staring into the end of his own barrel”   
She panted, her voice betraying her arousal, which she prayed silently Benny hadn’t picked up on.  
  
“What do you want to know.” He growled  
  
His hands snaked along her curves, mapping out wherever her body jutted out as if making sure it would be etched into his memory. His touch was ever intimate and deliberate, like he was trying to coax her out of her upperhand position as well as make an imprint of every inch of her body into his mind. She felt her body’s natural response like electricity being summoned from the tips of his fingers, and he might’ve succeeded in regaining his upper hand had she not been ever aware of the danger he posed, the risks going along with playing his games.  
  
“Who am I to you?”   
  
She shuddered, it seemed unlikely both of them would leave this suite alive, maintaining a role seemed less important the longer their encounter went on.  
  
He sighed and for once she saw him looking down, a look on his face she could only think of as solemn. She desperately wanted to understand it, understand any of this.  
  
“You wound me Christy, had I known you considered me so forgettable I wouldn’t have bothered to…”  
  
His voice trailed off, a multitude of thoughts painted along his face as he seemed to search for the right words.  
  
She scanned his scarp features, a light stubble creeping up along his jawline, her eyes scanning along his dark skin as if she could taste the light coating of sweat glistening along his face. She met his dark eyes, heavy lidded despite feeling the cool kiss of his own gun now resting against his temple. a single bead of sweat dripped down his forehead alluding her to the fact that he was very much aware of the position he was in. The danger looming above his well styled head of hair, her instincts got the better of her as she lapped up that very same bead, eliciting a soft moan at the salty taste of him. It was so very reminiscent of the taste of his cum coating her mouth.  
  
Those same dark eyes looked up at her as If searching for some sort of answer she knew she wasn’t able to give. All she could be certain of in that moment was how much she wanted him, a part of her chest ached at his expression, as if she felt bad for something even though she couldn’t remember jack all.   
  
“We were engaged.” He hissed, as if feeling incredibly ashamed about having to speak those words out loud.  
  
Cherry however felt the back of her head burn, as if he was tip toeing along the treasure chest of memories she so desperately wanted to unlock.  
  
Was he lying? He couldn’t be could he? He seemed to believe she knew who he was, how could he have figured out such a lie. But then again his demeanor had changed, he almost seemed _softer_ after his supposed understanding of who she was, had he meant something to her before? Was that why she had yet to pull the trigger after weeks of being driven by nothing else except the image of his brains splattered along the walls of his pristine Vegas home.  
  
“Prove it.” She stuttered, pressing the gun harder against his temple, she fealt her eyes well up and a sense of rage overtake her. It wasn’t good, she couldn’t possible keep her upper hand when her emotions ran wild like this.  
  
He looked at her as if she had asked him to give her the moon, how could he possibly prove it to her?   
  
His response took her off guard as his big, calloused hands grabbed a hold of her face, his lips seeking hers out like a dying man finding a pond of fresh water.   
  
Tears kept falling down her face as she met his kiss, opening her mouth up for his tongue to seek hers out.  
  
She mewled softly, her emotions running wild, it was seemingly all too much to take in. But it felt so right, like he was pouring his heart out into this kiss.  
  
Dropping the gun to the ground she fully expected him to reach for it, to desperately regain his upper hand, but he didn’t. Instead his arms grabbed ahold of her back, pressing her chest against his so hard it almost hurt without ever breaking contact between their mouths.

 

* * *

 

He watched out over the planes of the Mojave, Hoover dam wasn’t far off their trail and he felt his body fighting against him as he walked the planes with heavy armor covering most of his body.  
  
The disease had spread further, medicine had been easy enough to come by before but recently it has been all the more hard to come by, the legion held the power and money that had been enough for him to get by so far, but now the reality of the wasteland was settling into him.   
  
His helmet was heavy and filled with sweat, he never allowed his men to see the now sunken in face underneath and thus he had to strain himself further and further as the sickness progressed.   
  
Hopefully the battle before him would allow him a dignified end; he had reached an age high enough where his hair was now mostly gray and that was more than most legionnaires could hope for.  
  
It was hard to take peace in his good fortune when his legs felt that they might break at any point and that his mind was always too scattered to catch on to, like a constant cloud in which his thoughts were lost before he could catch up to them. He’d resorted to write speaking off as a _womanly_ measure as a result and so far his strength had still held up, but now it seemed he would be no more than a shell at the end of all this.  
  
He only needed to hang on for a while longer, if those NCR dogs wouldn’t finish him off he would have to do it himself.  
  
It was all because of some whore, a disease given to him as he’d staked his claim where it was his to take. But somehow it had led him her, to a point of weakness strong enough where it would cause his death.  
  
He knew he was the right man to lead the legion, the right man to rid the Mojave of the curse that was loose women and the men who were weak enough to succumb to them.   
  
He had played his cards right, made himself believe control was within his reach however much he abused the creatures below him, but it had cost him. Since he knew the illness within him he had made sure to spread it on to those who were destined to die. Whores thinking their lives would be secured by their actions. He knew better, he was their reaper, the one who would bring the mighty wrath of the legion upon them. But he also knew hell was just a few steps away, his doom lurking around the corner, ready to strike whenever.  
  
Atleast he had made his footprint on the weak slitherkin leader, making sure the alliance with the people now known as the Omertas would fall through.  
  
A footsoldier approached him with purified water in hand as he stopped his stride, another weak male hellbent on keeping him alive. Such a foolish endeavor, these ridiculous men trying their hardest to gain ranks where none was there to claim.   
  
He gulped down the drink, lifting his helmet just enough to expose his thin and now jagged lips. His eyes ever focused on the creature before him, the filthy man caring little of pride, more like a roach in his resilience.

“Get lost.” He muttered as he discarded the bottle to the sand beneath his feet. Causing the younger man to sprint away.  
  
Just a few more days he reassured himself, just a few more days and his honorable death would set him free from the profligates.


	16. You give love a bad name

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I dedicate this chapter to "Ex" and "Shelby Gay" because your comments inspired me to write it! <3
> 
> (Turns out they’re the same person so this ones for you and you alone sweet thing!)
> 
> Added note  
> (Its inspired by your kindness, the filthy part is all the work of my own noggin’ lol)

It became hard to breathe, a litany of feelings coursing through her as if she was high on something experimental bought from a sketchy trader. His hands were everywhere, as if he somehow tried to speak to her through touch alone.  
  
His fingers seemed to know her body in the most intimate of ways, ways she herself didn’t know could make her knees buckle.  
  
Keeping his one hand on the back of her neck as if to make sure she didn’t run off, his other hand dragged her skirt up, tearing the fabric off it in his eagerness to reach her further. She fully expected him to go for the prize as quickly as he had before, leaving her hardly enough time to breathe before pressing himself inside of her now aching folds.  
  
But instead he simply dragged his fingers along the inside of her thigh, only slightly coming close to touching the side of those skimpy panties she wore underneath. Moving his lips to the sensitive part behind her earlobe, licking it and sucking her earlobe into his mouth. It felt familiar, like a lovers practiced touch aiming to make flames long since forgotten awaken once more.  
  
She cursed silently to herself as she realized, how she had after all gone down on him not an hour earlier, even if he wasn’t a very patient man to the core she had dug her own grave and unintentionally given over her power.  
  
His touch that had used to be fire to her, a massive jut of power surging through her every pore as he touched her had now become something more intimate. Something that instead made her feel her chest cave in, as if something was squeezing down hard on an artery and making her breath shallow.  
  
Her tears kept on coming down her face, softly and without her understanding as to why. As he noticed he dragged his thumb against the droplets of salty water, wiping them away before kissing her face as if to heal her sadness.  
  
That did her in, it was too intimate, too much and she just wanted to get this over with. She knew where this was going, engaged or not she couldn’t let him in. It would ruin everything she had worked for. Her heart ached too much at the possibility of it, like a delicious torture that she herself knew would ultimately do her in, ruin her for all the plans she’d had in mind for as long as she could remember.  
  
Her hands went straight to his pants, desperately trying to fumble her way back in to where she knew she could regain the distance he seemed intent on erasing. Fucking him felt impersonal, like a move of simple power to remove any strings his actions might’ve pulled on her heart. A weak organ she couldn’t live without, something she wanted to fight as if knowing giving into his touch would be the death of her.  
  
But he wouldn’t let her, the hand that had previously played with the inside of her thighs grabbed both of her wrists as if they were no more than twigs, easily snapped as he drew them into him.  
  
“Not yet.” He growled, as if scolding her and realizing what she was trying to do.  
  
She let out a gasp as he let go of her neck, bringing her hands up to his mouth, her own hands going limp as he put each of them in to each of his, entwining their fingers and kissing hers with a tenderness that made her let out a strange yelp.  
  
“Why are you doing this?” She shuddered at the sheer intimacy of his movements.  
  
He searched her eyes out, those horrendously beautiful dark brown orbs she felt herself drowning into more and more with each second.  
  
“I am proving it.” Was his strangely calm response before his hands reached down to pull her up to where he was standing, carrying her with his hands cupped over her ass to steady her.  
  
Her slightly torn dress made it so her panty clad crotch was pressed directly against his stomach, him still being fully dressed as he carried her over to the bed.  
  
He laid her down as if she was something to be treasured, something he held so very dear and didn’t want to harm. It was such a strange feeling after these days of power struggle between the two of them, he felt so open, so vulnerable to her as he seemingly declared something from deep within him into how he handled her.  
  
Her head seemed to tear open as pictures she couldn’t know were actually real pressed from the back of her mind to dance along her closed eyelids.  
  
_A younger man, inexperienced and dressed much less properly, an outcast from his own people just as she had been. Two people finding salvation in each other’s touch when neither knew much of tenderness to begin with._  
  
His fingers trailed across her body, dragging down her dress and exposing those expensive pieces of lingerie she’d worn. Somehow, somewhere, she felt herself being more exposed than ever before. He drank in her body with his eyes, licking the space between her breast as they became exposed to him. His hands still holding her limp wrists in place as he licked her up as if she were the most tasty of treats.  
  
She saw his now trembling fingers reach out to no doubt rip her bra off, like a virgin not understanding how to handle the flimsy fabric keeping him from where he wanted to go.  
  
With a gesture of her hand she stopped him and reached behind her back to find the clasp she could hardly figure out herself, desperate to stop him from ruining something so pretty.  
  
A slight chuckle at her motions brought her eyes back up to his.  
  
“Still a country girl at heart I see.” He murmured, as if he suddenly saw her _so_ clearly. His voice tender, almost solemn at the proclamation.  
  
_Hopeful dark brown eyes, kiss stained lips and a smile that made her heart ache as he had finally told her those words she had longed to hear since first seeing him._  
  
_“Vill du gifta dig med mig?” In an accent almost worse than hers, words he had worked so hard to make her mama teach him to pronounce._  
  
And finally something clicked within her, that recognition of who he was to her. His special place in her heart.  
  
She suddenly realized why he felt so familiar, why he was different from Nero, Cachino, hell any other man she’d come across since coming here.  
  
_He was hers, always had been._  
  
The bra clasps sprang open along with her heart as she threw her arms over his shoulders, kissing him earnestly with all the pent up emotions she hadn’t understood the nights before. All the rage and hurt she somehow felt deep inside, as if she’d denied herself without knowing it.  
  
The contented hum he let out as her tongue reached out and found his was a sound that shot straight to her heart, his voice somehow deeper than she had remembered it.  
  
His previous constraints seemed to be fading away as well, as he ripped off what remained of her dress, causing her to yelp in surprise and stare down at the beautiful piece of fabric now strewn discarded at the floor.  
  
He wouldn’t allow her eyes to wonder for more than a second before his hand brought her face back to his, hot lips trailing down her neck, peppering kisses as his hand grabbed at the side of her hip to yank down that last bit of annoying fabric keeping her from being fully naked beneath him.  
  
“I can buy you a thousand more dresses Christy, do not let your eyes leave me ever again.”  
  
It was almost enough to send her over the edge, feeling the full force of his possessiveness over her. No touch seemingly needed for his power over her to work its magic, nothing more than his love to make her come undone beneath him.  
  
When she fell back he hooked his arms around her as if trying to stop her, something boyish and hurt in the way his eyes suddenly wouldn’t meet hers. It was as if he was terrified of her leaving, terrified of letting her go for even one second as if she could evaporate into thin air unless he held on to her tightly.  
  
Seeing the movements of her hand going to her panties however his eyes suddenly became visible, that mischievous grin of his returning, allowing her just enough space to remove them. A sense of release big enough to reach her heart urging her on, days of him hiding all of him from her, this one chance at seeing his vulnerability making her ache for him like never before.  
  
She leaned back as she felt him licking along her collarbone now, shuddering at the warm, wet sensation of him exploring her, claiming every inch of her body with his tongue.  
  
He made a trail down to her breasts, biting down lightly on her nipple and creating goosebumps along her skin.  
  
A soft chuckle alluded to him being please with her strong reactions at something to small, calculated agonizingly slow movements no doubt being meant to drive her mad.  
  
It was working, his complete neglect of touching her where she wanted and not allowing her to touch him either felt like the most annoying but intoxicating thing she could ever remember experiencing.  
  
But then a pang of something strange entered her chest, the boy she remembered couldn’t possibly be experienced enough in anything sexual to have done the things he had to her the last few days.  
  
He must’ve found these things out elsewhere and if her suspicions weren’t enough, she had been hired in the way she had for that _exact_ reason.  
  
There was no denying it, she felt incredibly jealous and not knowing what had made them separate, how she had become a package courier without any identity other than “Courier 6” didn’t make any sense.  
  
Had she been avoiding him? Was he maybe even the most dangerous man of all the ones she’d come across in Vegas?  
  
As if seeing her mind travel his finger snaked ever so lightly across her wetness, finding her clitoris and rubbing down on it as he bit the side of her neck.  
  
“Stay with me, don’t be a bad girl or I might just have to _punish_ you.”  
  
His tone was playful, his movements making her buck down against his hand involuntarily in response.  
  
_But what if he was serious?_  
  
She reached her hips up to meet his movements, knowing the possible danger, the fear in the back of her mind telling her she shouldn’t. But there was something more to consider, something that made her heart ache – had she loved him?  
  
His calloused hand travelled down her curves, memorizing her body as if he was longing to sculpt it from memory. As he reached her hips he grabbed for a pillow close to where her head laid resting, patting the side of her with his hand and making her rise her hips as if she knew by instinct what he wanted from her.  
  
The sensation that followed had her cry out softly, seeing his face truly looking down between her legs where she laid fully exposed to her was almost enough to do her in. He looked like a starving coyote, finding a prized prey lying before him as if it was served on a platter.  
  
Rough hands reaching to spread her thighs made her lids grow heavy with desire, still incredibly focused on his every move as he dropped his face down low enough where she could feel his breaths on her core.  
  
“Tell me what you want Christy.” He murmured, dark brown eyes meeting hers, relentless in the way they bore into her skull.  
  
Suddenly feeling shy for the first time with him she felt as if she might stutter, she knew what she wanted, but could she word it out loud?  
  
She tried to use body language to no avail, stroking along the side of his face and bucking her hips as if urging him on, but he was cruel and avoided her movements as if he was practiced in all of her reactions.  
  
“I want your tongue on me, in me, and then I want more.” She gasped, feeling her sense of shame becoming overpowered by her sense of desire.  
  
His chuckle rumbled through her as his tongue plunged into her folds, as if trying to fuck her with his tongue alone, his fingers searching out her clitoris and using her own wetness as lubricant as to calm down the extreme sensitivity of his motions.  
  
At that moment it was however not needed, her body felt like a tightly taut string, ready to let go as soon as humanly possible. His touch was addictive, his tongue purely sinful in its relentlessness. She wanted him to fuck her, wanted him to come inside her for reasons she didn’t know.  There was that feeling she’d had the first night they’d reunited in this primal way returning to her senses.  
  
She wanted him to make her pregnant, fiancé or no she wanted it so badly she could hardly express it with words.  
  
Her fingers found his hair underneath her, pressing his face further into her, mewling barely understandable words as he ate her like the most prized of deserts.  
  
This was her undoing and she wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.  
  
Her climax was creeping onto her, but she wanted more, she knew he could give her multiple orgasms if he wanted to but that feeling of him withdrawing and that slight pain which would follow was enough to urge him to stop.  
  
The groan he let out as she pushed him away was almost enough on its own to make her come undone, she could hardly speak through her arousal as she grabbed his aching cock through those stupid checkered trousers of his.  
  
“Fuck me.” She murmured, completely lost in her own arousal, not wanting to wait another second for whatever he could give her. His mouth was masterly but it wasn’t enough anymore.  
  
His heavy lids were all the answer she needed, as if he’d waited for her words he worked his fly open clumsily, fully distraught by whatever was going through his mind as his lips sought hers out.  
  
She could taste herself on his tongue, a slightly bitter tang which if possible made her want his cock even more.  
  
Growing impatient as he tried to align himself with her opening she found his length above her and pressed him into her with an eagerness that had him laughing through his arousal.  
  
“So insatiable” he murmured before pressing through her aching folds.  
  
It was as if her cunt has tried to clamp itself together since the last time, overworked from all the attention drawn to it in the last few days as he tried to press into it as gently as his willpower could muster.  
  
She however wasn’t nearly as patient, impaling herself on his length as fast as she could, the dull pain following only serving to aid in the sheer filthiness of her want for him. She couldn’t wait for her body to accept him, her mind already had.  
  
He seemed equally impatient, hurriedly slamming home into her at an impatient speed that had her seeing stars. There was never enough, the moments she felt him filling her truly, fully  were almost too short. It was as if she wanted him to fuck her while simply staying as far into her as he was physically able, but the delicious feeling of him bucking into her, the pain to her pelvis caused by the sheer force of his movements made her feel delirious.  
  
“Come inside me, please come inside me.” She mewled, her nails finding their way under the upper parts of his suit to drag along the small of his back.  
  
His responding growl let her know his willpower was slipping, that he was still fighting it but she could coax him into following her demands.  
  
She pushed her face up to meet his lips, hands embracing his neck before pulling his ear to his mouth.  
  
“I know you want this, know you want me heavy with you child baby, just give into me, I am yours.”  
  
Hips coming to a halt, stuttering movements and his jaw falling upon unceremoniously, a growing heat spreading deep inside of her let her know she’d reached her goal. Her climax following his, hard enough where she felt her body milking him, hard enough to where she heard him swearing from above her before he devoured her mouth in the most passionate kiss of her life.  
  
She felt fulfilled, filled to the brim of him essence and his love. There weren’t enough words to describe it, most of her memories still stored away she for the first time since waking back up felt as if she’d be fine as she was.


	17. The fear

Waking up felt like a punch to her chest, fear spreading throughout her body like a potent raider-made poison filling up her bloodstream. It was the next day and the delirious drug like state of her freshly found love (was it really fresh? More importantly, was it really love?) had her mind spinning in overdrive.  
  
She could feel the bed behind her supporting the weight of another, could feel the slight heat emitting from his body. But she also felt the sensation of dread biting into her; he had fucked her after she’d pointed a gun at him. He had fucked her to prove a fucking point, not because he had simply found out her identity and had remained unable to bring himself down from any sort of want.  
  
Tears threatened to spill over her cheeks, the fear filling her chest was overbearing. He had shot her in the head and she had been dumb enough to simply go along with instinct despite that fact weighing down onto every part of her mind still able to process logic. There was no telling how much of what she actually felt was based in truth and she couldn’t even use her memories to guide her to make a calculated decision.  
  
The next step before her, how she would go forward from here, it was an impossible thing to process. She wanted to run off, escape away from the towering lights of new Vegas and find a nice little shack in the middle of the desert to call her own, maybe find herself a cat or two. Facing him, realizing she had been fucking someone who had actually cared so little for her? That fear dominated any sort of curiosity of finding out if she may have been right.  
  
She felt him stirring, a larger body turning and pulling her close like she was someone wanted, like she was somehow someone precious.  
  
There was no longer anything stopping her tears from spilling out, a silent stream laced with all of what was cooped up in her chest making a slow trail down her face; this moment was too powerful, the things filling her chest made her too vulnerable. With no memories to let her know if she would be safe trusting him, but plenty of them telling her she shouldn’t; she felt she needed to get out and fast.  
  
His warm arm around her felt disgustingly right, like his chest was a place in which she could find home. But it was too new to her, too uncertain and more than anything else – too dangerous.  
  
Feeling nothing, putting up her walls of control and aiming to get him to abide to them, all of that felt safe to her. Had he simply played along and showed her the level of not caring which she wished for, it maybe could have served as enough. Now he had broken through her defenses and it left her terrified, like an animal pressed up against walls of her own making.  
  
She couldn’t allow this to continue, couldn’t allow this level of uncertainty to determine her fate. All it would take was for him to reach for his gun once more and she’d have might as well have helped him to pull the trigger.  
  
Escape remained her one true option, the 38 could act as her safehouse. House would keep her safe, his robots would act as a safeguard, she had earned that much even though he too was an unknown.  
  
Snaking her way from beneath Benny’s arm she thought to herself; with what little control that still remained in her mind, where could he have stashed that fucking chip? He wasn’t dumb enough to leave it lying around was he?  
  
She searched the pockets of his discarded jacket, the scent of him tickling her nose in a disgustingly heart wrenching way as she did so.  


Nothing – much as expected but still disappointing as she gave up on her mission. There was no point snooping around for much longer when he might wake up at any second after all.

  
Her feet once again met the filthy old carpet she had come to despise, but now it served as a way to remind herself she was still here. Pieces of fabric which might have once been soft to the touch clegged together from years of being walked on, years of stored filth culminating into little hard balls of tuft guiding her away. They were much like how she herself felt at that moment, used and left to rot.  
  
She could see his sleeping face in the corner of her eye as she made her way to her clothes, scattered along the floor like a trail of evidence of her own dumbness. She needed to get out of here and fast, but a great big part of her chest ached at the prospect of him actually being who her naïve heart longed for him to be; someone who might have simply mistaken her for another, someone who might actually love her as much as she had felt that he had the previous night.  
  
It was too dangerous a risk to take, she couldn’t afford to be sentimental. The silenced gun in her stocking brought her back to life as it slid along her thigh into her stocking, the cool steel of its neck steadying her; reminded her that she was still alive.  
  
But part of her, a deep dark pit at the bottom of her stomach wished for a moment that she wasn’t. That her head was still laid to rest on the soft dirt of that goodsprings cemetery, unbothered by foolish emotions and memories pressing through her mind.  
  
  
The hallway to the elevator was guarded as always but the men patrolling the area seemed unbothered as she closed the large doors to the suite. Like they couldn’t fathom that their boss wouldn’t have been able to handle her, a simple hooker clad like a prey to predators making her way through cold unfeeling walls clad with mold and dust.  
  
She felt herself longing for her mother, anything that might ground her to the present and allow her to stay there. A man couldn’t be allowed to continue being the most impactful part of her life, she needed to find out where the fuck she came from and fast.


End file.
